Rules of the TARDIS
by spaceboi101
Summary: After many stuff ups The doctor and The TARDIS have made a list of rules  rated M for possible future rules
1. the start

**Rules for the TARDIS**

Never ever use the psychic paper to get out of speeding tickets, bar tabs and warrants for your arrest

Never play hide and seek in the TARDIS, you will get lost and I'm not coming to look for you

Never ask The Master if he and The Doctor have ever had sex and if so did Romana and Brax join in ?,while the Doctor's reaction will be hilarious he will start acting all emo because they died in the time war.

Never crank call the Daleks because they will track you all through time and space

Never quote portal (1,2,3) because it will freak out some new people that are traveling with The Doctor because you are quoting a game a game that will not come out for a another 4 years form 2011 and Doctor does not like it when people mistake it for a genocidal A.I

Never ask to go to a historical event and try to change history (_Doctors note : honestly stop that I have enough on my plate without having to deal with a paradox and more often then not unlike Pete Tyler he/she/it wont kill themselves to stop the end of the universe)_

And above all for the love of whatever god you believe in stay alive 


	2. moar rules

**Rules for the TARDIS**

**chapter 2 moar rules**

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings  
><strong>

**1. **no singing any of those annoying songs it does strange things to a time lord and I, the TARDIS will not allow him to try and go back and kill them before they wrote the song (thats how the Master got started)

**2.** no trying to rickroll him, he will get his revenge on you on strange and cruel ways

**3. **no trying to get him change fixed points in time, we have been through this once and that is enough for our lifespans thank you very much

**4. **no trying to sneak any pets on because I will find it and I will be very _very _annoyed (Doctor's note _yeah I do not recommend this last time Amy tried to do that turns out that Rory is very allergic to its fur and the TARDIS does not like it when "the pretty one" is threatened and quickly got rid of it)_

**5. **if you know him from the future (river song I'm looking at you _) _do try and resist the urge to tell him how he dies it will make him a lot more careful and he may miss something that will stop him from saving the day

**all right people you know the drill review and put in suggestions for future rules KTHANXBAI  
><strong>


	3. look people moar rules

**Rules for the TARDIS**

**chapter 3 moar rules**

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**I GOT MY FIRST REVIEW THANK YOU FAI GENSU YOU HAVE THE HONOR OF BEING THE FIRST PERSON OF REVIEW ANY OF MY STORIES**

** ahem anyway I have many more rules to share with you who knows maybe someone else besides the doctor will comment on the TARDIS's rules anyway lets get onto the rules **

**6. **don't eat the Doctor's fish fingers and custard. It won't end well. Same goes for Jammy Dodgers (Amy's note: the TARDIS right about this, Doctor does not like it when people steal his food)

**7. **do not try and destroy his fez or tell him that the bow tie is uncool (_Rory's note: yeah guys I may have accidentally told him that and now he's locked himself in his room and wont let anyone in**) **(**TARDIS'S note: I got this guys)**_

**8. **never try to seduce The Doctor (**_TARDIS'S note: AMY!, RORY!)_** and say that either A, that aliens made you do it or B say some sort of sex pollen made you do it (**_TARDIS'S note: I have had a look at the guide and where we were just before it happened the pollen in the air did not contain anything that would cause THOSE sort of symptoms anyway if any of you started to show symptoms of that I would put you in quarantine SEPARATE chambers)_**

** 9. **never try and go back in time and try and make a prophecy about what will happen because more often then not they do not like prophets and they will burn you

**10. **whenever you meet a past regeneration of The Doctor do not tell him how he will die

**11. **when the Doctor tells you to run, you _run_

**all right people you know the drill review and put in suggestions for future rules KTHANXBAI**

**so do you think i should put in little bits of a storyline in this, like how certain rules came into being, tell me in you reviews thanx people  
><strong>


	4. the return of the rules

**Rules for the TARDIS**

**chapter 3 the rules return  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**12.** The Doctor is not allowed to get raging drunk. Buzzed and tipsy are okay, but when he hits raging drunk he winds up in situations that are technically impossible by the laws of space and time and loses all his clothes. While some may enjoy the view (cough Amy cough) it is not worth the hassle of the aftermath. Not to mention the amount of alcohol it takes would kill 5 liquor-hardened Scots

**13. **Don't remind him of previous companions. While he may act cavalier about them, he will brood after you all go to sleep. and when he broods he aims to get raging drunk, which we DON'T want.

**14. **The Doctor is not allowed to go more than two Earth weeks without sleep. Any attempt to surpass this or try and break his current sleepless record of three Earth months will result in Rory being provided the strongest sedatives aboard (with the largest needle), help in sneaking up on him, and the bedrooms hidden so he is forced to be passed out on the console room steps.

**15. **never try to call torchwood to deal with a alien invasion, the Doctor will start to think we dont need him and will try and drink himself into a stupor (see rule 12)

**16. **never try to drink the Doctor under the table (**_TARDIS: Jack I'm looking at you) _** the time lord will drink you under the table so hard you will be dead or you will wish you were dead

**all right people you know the drill review and put in suggestions for future rules KTHANXBAI**

**so do you think i should put in little bits of a storyline in this, like how certain rules came into being, tell me in you reviews thanx people  
><strong>


	5. the rules are back!

**Rules for the TARDIS**

**chapter 3 the rules return  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**to Fai Gensu: yeah but add in a bit of rule 15 and you are on the money **

**to Heather Jayne: thanks i am getting on with more rules **

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**17.** No sex on the TARDIS while flying through the time vortex unless you are completely sterile and/or have reliable contraceptives. Anything mechnical the Doctor provides claiming 100% foolproof will turn the smallest failure rate into a sure thing (since he tosses the manuals). If you feel the urge, just let him know. He will drop you off somehow and leave for a week.

**18**. never mention when the doctor had sex it upsets the TARDIS (_doctors note: trust me on this)_

**19. **Doctor no trying to seduce Amy, Rory or River, while Amy will not mind Rory will chase you around the control room with a sword (Amy's note: while that may look funny the Doctor will hide AND WE CAN NOT GO BACK HOME!) (_Rory's note: I'm sorry Doctor please come back) _(_**Doctor's note: alright lets get going where to next guys?) **_

__**20. **do not ask what the Time Lords used to worship it will only make the Doctor launch into a long talk about how the time lords used to have many gods and they all were very different and very powerful E.T.C

**all right people you know the drill review and put in suggestions for future rules KTHANXBAI**

**so do you think i should put in little bits of a storyline in this, like how certain rules came into being, tell me in you reviews thanx people**

**alright maybe starting next chapter i will put in a key for who is writing what notes alright get on your way ppls see ya  
><strong>


	6. the rules have returned

**Rules for the TARDIS**

**chapter 6 there are more rules  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**I have noticed something I HAVE NO REVIEWS! so can you please give me some reviews thanks  
><strong>

**21. **No going to Terra Nova and telling them that they are on another planet

**22. **Yes, we did go back and save dalek sec so you do not need to attack him screaming "AHHH DALEK KILL IT, KILL IT" (SEC'S NOTE:**_ YES IT IS QUITE ANNOYING I DO NOT WANT TO HURT THEM BUT IF IT CONTINUES I WILL BE FORCED TO TAKE ACTION THANK YOU) _**

**23. **No playing Justin Bieber on board the TARDIS (**_SEC'S NOTE: YES I FIND THE YOUNG MALE'S SONGS VERY CATCHY BUT THEY WILL NOT LEAVE MY HEAD AFTERWARD, ERGO I WILL BE VERY ANGRY IF SOME ONE DISRUPTS MY WORK TO MAKE THE DALEK'S HUMAN)_**

** 24. **No taking the TARDIS into a Stargates wormhole, you will almost certainly take one of the earth's exploration groups and the government which operates the program will not like it if they think we kidnapped one of there best teams

**25. **No you may not ask to see if there is any feeling in Sec's tentacles, we already know that there is and he does not like being poked **  
><strong>

**all right people you know the drill review and put in suggestions for future rules KTHANXBAI**

**so do you think i should put in little bits of a storyline in this, like how certain rules came into being, tell me in you reviews thanx people**

**alright do you like the fact that i brought back dalek sec and I will not be posting a new chapter until i get 5 reviews so if you want to see any more rules put a review up so thanks for reading and hope you have a good night  
><strong>


	7. the revenge of the rules

**Rules for the TARDIS**

**chapter 6 there are more rules  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**I have noticed something I HAVE NO REVIEWS! so can you please give me some reviews thanks  
><strong>

**26. **Dalek Sec no scaring anyone (Amy's note: yeah can you stop that Rory has taken to carrying a sword) (_Rory's note: Sec I do like you and I do not want to hurt you so for the love of whatever god daleks believe in stop it please) _**(Doctors note: look me and Amy are trying to stop Rory from hurting you but dammit man err dalek thingy anyway what was I saying stop it plz) **(what was that doctor?) **(nothing) **(**SEC'S NOTE: IT APPEARS YOU WERE USING AN INTERNET SAYING ) **

**27. **River should not make references regarding her sex life with the Doctor, now that Amy and Rory know who you are. While Amy is still stuck on being the Doctor's mother-in-law, Rory isn't, and will make up for years of not being there by avenging his daughters' honor. And no, the fact that the two of you are married NOW will not make past comments better (_Rory's note: grrrrrrrrrrrrrr) _

**28. **no going back upon your own time stream KTHAXBAI (Amy's note: see Doctor you have got the TARDIS doing it)

**29. **NO LEET SPEAK DAMMIT WE NEED THE TARDIS FULLY FUNCTIONAL

**we are at the end of another chapter so leave more reviews and give me more rules thax  
><strong>

**all right people you know the drill review and put in suggestions for future rules KTHANXBAI**

**so do you think i should put in little bits of a storyline in this, like how certain rules came into being, tell me in you reviews thanx people**


	8. look more rules!

**Rules for the TARDIS**

**chapter 6 there are more rules  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**I have noticed something I HAVE NO REVIEWS! so can you please give me some reviews thanks  
><strong>

**30. **no bothering Amy or River when it is their time of the month you will die (_Rory's note: no really you will die River's got a gun)_

**31. ** "I am a British citizen! I have nothing to fear!" *bang* "Except bullets..."

**32. **"Everything in this general direction must die!" (**Doctor's note: what Rory?) **(Rory's note: its from a video game)

**33. **no strip poker

**34. **Sec when we ask you what the dalek ship was like do not say "It's a smorgasboard of mindless violence!"

**35. Tardis no quoting portal, it freaks everyone out because you sound like a lot like the computer lady **

**36.** When The Doctor says something like "uh-oh", "that's the opposite of good" or "RUN!" you RUN!

**we are at the end of another chapter so leave more reviews and give me more rules thax  
><strong>

**all right people you know the drill review and put in suggestions for future rules KTHANXBAI**

**so do you think i should put in little bits of a storyline in this, like how certain rules came into being, tell me in you reviews thanx people**


	9. the rules have been brought back to life

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 9 the rules have been brought back from the dead  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**I have noticed something I HAVE NO REVIEWS! so can you please give me some reviews thanks  
><strong>

**37.** Sec is not allowed to hit on Amy or River, we do not care that you are trying to see how your new fully human body works and Rory has been seen making his sword extra sharp so you may be killed and the Doctor will not protect you because you are hitting on his wife (**Doctor's note:** **grrrrrr**)(Rory's note: grrrrr)

**38. **Rory no trying to kill Sec

**39. **No trying to go back and change your personal history

**sorry for the short chapter but i have no new ideas** **so I need all my loyal people to give me more reviews so please give me more rules thanks **


	10. review special

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 10 the reviewers special  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**THANKS to all my reviews alright individual messages:**

**HELEN EMRYS sure i am gonna make you an companion of the doctor can i just get a personalty for your character thanks**

** IM SOOOOOO DUMB (no your not) I love your suggestion and can see that happening and that is a good idea hope you give me some more**

** WHY HASN'T 3DS GOT YOUTUBE (I know right) I like the idea so wait for the end of the last chapter for that**

**fai gensu GET OUT OF MY BRAIN!**

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**.  
><strong> **38. **The Doctor is not allowed to go to haunted house attractions. Not only does he scare the actors by proclaiming his love for their costumes, he will sonic the attraction into being scarier, and we really don't want that, especially when you consider what the Doctor considers scary.

**39. **Jack is not allowed to hit on Amy or River. Even if they flirt back, and the Doctor knows it's not serious, Rory will still seek a live demonstration of his immortality.

**40. **don't leave pear's on the console or the doctor won't leave the zero room untill you have spend 3 hours bleaching where you put the pear and then he wont fly the TARDIS for a day (Amy's note: my hands hurt) 

**41. **once in a while the Tardis take's the Doctor where the Doctor wants to go.

**_Doctor are you there?..._**

* * *

><p><strong>alright what do you think?. lets make the next chapter a themed one how about rules about Batman Arkham CityModern warfare 3 **

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**


	11. a new chapter! yay!

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 10 the reviewers special  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**one messege this time: **

**Fai Gensu: please do not stop giving me rules you give me some of the best rules thanks  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**42. **Rory is only allowed to play 3 hours of Modern Warfare 3 per day (Rory's note: why?) (**Do****ctor's note: because you are always playing that game and Amy is about to kill you, also I do not like that game**)

**43.** No more "that's what she said" jokes

** 44. **Sec is not allowed to play saints row the third because he trying to do all the things you can do in the game

** 45. **The Doctor and His Companions must be very carefull if they end up pushing the wrong button on the Tardis Console because who knows where they could end up (Rory's note: it took me three days to find the control room, why is the TARDIS so big?)

** 46.** Sec is no longer allowed to start singing "nothing suits me like a suit"

**47.** You are allowed to tease Helen because she is the only fully single one in the TARDIS (_Amy's note: what about Sec?) _(Rory's note: if we tease him things start going missing, I said I was sorry Sec now where is my towel?)

**48.** Sec is not allowed to steal things

** 49. **River is not allowed to try and destroy the Doctor's fez **  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>alright what do you think?. lets make the next chapter a themed one how about rules about the TARDIS's and the Doctor's birthday<br>**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**


	12. not many rules

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 10 the reviewers special  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**one messege this time: **

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**50.** Sec and Doctor are not allowed to get drunk because the last time that happened they tried to build a way to go to a another universe so they could A. see how Rose and the other Doctor are doing and if in another universe they are a T.V. show (**Doctor's note: and on both counts yes)**

**51**. no giving Rory and Amy any alcohol because they will try to kill Sec because they think that he is still evil and will use Rory's sword to run him through with it

**52.** no trying to perform Inception on any one else because some times you may see things you do not want to see

**alright what do you think?. lets make the next chapter a themed one how about rules about the TARDIS's and the Doctor's birthday  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**ALSO I have a new story on my profile so go over to it and take a look. it may not be very good right now but remember : this was not very good so go over and give some ideas! thanks**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	13. the one before the birthday

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 12 the one before the birthday  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**one messege this time: **

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**53.** no bagpipes for the love of what ever god you believe in no bagpipes!

** 54. **no trying to build a light saber, do you want to blow up an entire solar system?

**55. **River is not allowed to use the 'shoot first and ask questions later' method

**56. **our motto is not "The fundamental laws of the universe are for lesser people.", officially anyway

**57. **we do not try to mess with laws of the universe, it only ends in tears trust us about us

**56. **there is no such thing as 'beer karma'

**57. **Sec has to sleep sometime, Helen is in charge of enforcing this rule as his assistant

**58. **no showing any new people we meet saints row the third, because they will think that all humans are like this and may just try to invade the earth to stop this behavior

**59.** NO ALCOHOL!

**60. **knock before entering a room, because Helen is now scared for life and it took three days for Sec to get her out of that air vent

**61. **we are not the four horsemen of the apocalypse so stop introducing us as that, were are also not the fantastic four

**62.**don't hog the x-box Rory, Amy will kill you if you don't let her play Batman Arkham City

**63. **don't try to out do each other because you will get each other killed

**65.** don't give Sec sugar, you will not be able to catch up with him for a few hours just let him burn of the energy

**alright what do you think?. lets make the next chapter a themed one how about rules about the TARDIS's and the Doctor's birthday  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**ALSO I have a new story on my profile so go over to it and take a look. it may not be very good right now but remember : this was not very good so go over and give some ideas! thanks**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	14. more new rules today

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 13 the one before the birthday again  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**one messege this time: **

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**66. **no quoting Scrubs

**67. **Rory's motto is not "Fight until your dying breath. Then get resurrected and keep fighting. Repeat until victorious."

**68.** no trying to dye Amy's hair, she will not like it and will try to get you back and she is very efficient at revenge

**69.** Helen is not allowed to get drunk, because she has a ex-Dalek around her finger and access to a high tech lab and she will try to get revenge on Amy

**70.** all prank wars stop now, at current count there are: Amy and Helen, Sec and Rory, Doctor and Rory, River and Sec, Amy and Sec, Doctor and Sec (poor Sec),Jack and River also Jack and Rory

**71. **no playing laser tag

**72. **no using Zats for laser tag, it will only end in tears.

**alright what do you think?. lets make the next chapter a themed one how about rules about the TARDIS's and the Doctor's birthday  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**I need more reviews thanks**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	15. when is the birthday again?

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 15 when is the birthday again?  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**one messege this time: **

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**73. **Amy is not allowed to flirt with Sec because her and Rory are having a fight, the poor little ex Dalek is confused enough about human sexuality without Amy adding to that (we only just got him used to being with one partner)

**74.** Helen is not allowed to kiss Sec randomly, he will freeze up because he is only just getting used to being in a relationship (**A.N. Do you like the fact that I put Sec and Helen in a relationship, tell me in the reviews plz)**

**75. **The Doctor and River are not allowed to flirt in the control room because Rory will try to kill you and it takes forever to clean out

**76.** not quoting horrible histories:

"God, why have you cursed me with only ladybabies?" (Rory was wondering how that happened)

"stupid deaths,stupid deaths lets hope the next one is not yooou" (Sec was working one a dead animal, and pointing at Helen needless to say she was not pleased with her boyfriend saying she might die)

"Helen... you is well fit. Your face could launch a thousand ships, yeah?" "Listen up, yeah! I want all us Greek soldiers to march on Troy, you get me? We're gonna tear that city UP! Kill dem all, izzit? Yeah, it is!" (you do not want to know)

"Up to two million bowels were evacuated... Children! Two million children were evacuated..."(the Doctor was taking us to the blitz and kinda had a Freudian slip)

"The truth is that he escaped to northern England and became a teacher. I know. He taught me." (Rory was telling everyone about Hitler, Damn Sec and his sudden exams)

" rule one. fight!, rule two. not fighting (Sec has some strange rules in his and Helen's lab)

"Yay! Our gallant navy has captured the nasty Spaniards with only one small leaking boat, two men, one cannon, a pistol, a sharp stick and a sponge!" (drunk!Sec is funny Sec)

**77.**Sec is not allowed to drink Alcohol

**alright what do you think?. lets make the next chapter a themed one how about rules about the TARDIS's and the Doctor's birthday  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**Review or I get more crazy (too late)  
><strong>

**hope you have a good day**

**I need more reviews thanks**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	16. crossover with merlin within

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 15 when is the birthday again?  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**one reviewer messege this time:**

**Helen Emery: I thought that in the old series it was said that the Doctor was Merlin but hey just tell me how that could happen and I will be sure to make some rules bout it, and is this the TV series universe?**

**and another from my other story: Helen your OC is in this Story  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**78. **when going back to Helen's place at Camelot you are not aloud to tell her brother that her boyfriend and the father of her unborn child is an alien that looks like a human because he is very good at using magic and will not get trouble for it because the law against magic has been overturned by Arther

**79. **you are not allowed to spike Merlin's drink with alcohol because when he is drunk he will try and kill Sec

**80.** no making Arther think that the TARDIS is magic because he will try to get Merlin to use magic against it

**81.** when you are going to go to Diego Garcia to go visit the Autobots call ahead because the soldiers do not know that the Doctor is an old friend

**82.** the Doctor is not aloud to glomp anyone

**I do not have anymore rules to give you people so plz send more thanx**

**alright what do you think?. lets make the next chapter a themed one how about rules about the TARDIS's and the Doctor's birthday  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**Review or I get more crazy (too late)  
><strong>

**hope you have a good day**

**I need more reviews thanks**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	17. more rules now

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 17 here is a new chapter ?  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**one reviewer messege this time:**

**Helen Emery:here is the answer to your question no, Sec is the boyfriend and father of Helen's baby (conceived outside the TARDIS so no Dalek-time lord hybrid) so sorry about that and also about the TARDIS and the Doctor having two birthdays I like it because it would be the sort of thing that time lords would do  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**83.** Sec is not allowed to when shooting a laser to shout "pew pew" because it is quite weird

**84. **Sec and Helen are not aloud to make the lab a separate country to the TARDIS (_VIVA LA REVOLUTION - SEC)_

**85.** Sec is not allowed to have access to the internet

**86.**Helen is not aloud to make a Animus because she may put Rory in another coma, turns out Rory had ancestors in ancient Rome and was an assassin.

**87.** Doctor is alud too have 2 partys due to a time lord law (_sure-Amy) (I'm being truthful-Doctor)_

**88.** Sec is not aloud to make a portal gun, are you trying to make a black hole?

**89.** Sec is not aloud to try and free run against Rory, because Rory has learned to free run from the Animus and Sec will be beaten. badly

**90.** Amy and Rory are not aloud to make out in front of Doctor and Sec

**I do not have anymore rules to give you people so plz send more thanx**

**alright what do you think?. lets make the next chapter a themed one how about rules about the TARDIS's and the Doctor's birthday  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**Review or I get more crazy (too late)  
><strong>

**hope you have a good day**

**I need more reviews thanks**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	18. 100 RULES YAY!

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 18 100 RULES YAY!  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**one reviewer messege this time:**

**Helen Emery:here is the answer to your question no, Sec is the boyfriend and father of Helen's baby (conceived outside the TARDIS so no Dalek-time lord hybrid) so sorry about that and also about the TARDIS and the Doctor having two birthdays I like it because it would be the sort of thing that time lords would do  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**91. **Helen is allowed to use her magic powers in an emergency.

**92.** Helen isn't allowed to eat jelly dalek sweets infront of Sec because it wouldn't be a nice thing to do (_where di get those-Rory) (magic-Helen)_

**93.** Sec is not allowed to give his and Helen's baby a delek name when their baby is born (_Sec is sulking in his lab saying something about " damn human's keeping The Next Generation Of Dalek's down"-Helen)_

**94.** The Doctor is not aloud to say "Like a boss" whenever he does something awesome

**95.** For Doctor, Rory and Sec,Life is not clothing optional _(I don't mind-Amy) (same here-River) (I agree- Helen__)_

**96.**Don't blink

**97.** The Doctor lies

**98**. No Nyan cat (_Sec has not come out of the lab I'm kinda afraid of what he is doing in there-Helen)_

**99.** Bow-ties are cool

**100.** Try to keep each other Alive

**YAY 100 rules, I do need more rules so please give me mor**

**alright what do you think?. lets make the next chapter a themed one how about rules about the TARDIS's and the Doctor's birthday  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**Review or I get more crazy (too late)  
><strong>

**hope you have a good day**

**I need more reviews thanks**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	19. the rules have come back to us

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 18 100 RULES YAY!  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

**one reviewer messege this time:**

**Helen Emery:here is the answer to your question no, Sec is the boyfriend and father of Helen's baby (conceived outside the TARDIS so no Dalek-time lord hybrid) so sorry about that and also about the TARDIS and the Doctor having two birthdays I like it because it would be the sort of thing that time lords would do**

**Fai Gensu: i ahve not herd from you in a long time, I hope you are doing fine and nothing has happened to you and please help me with some rules thanks  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**101. **Sec is not allowed to invite Davros to his wedding

**102. **it's never Lupus (_except when it is-Rory)_

**103.** you are not aloud to sell the TARDIS on EBAY

**104.** The Doctor is not aloud to go on tvtropes (_I found him still online today, he went online on Monday-Amy)_

**105. **the Dalek theme song is not "they see me rolling, they hating"

**106.** the Doctor is not aloud to sell anyone on EBAY

** 107. **you are not aloud to have an staring contest with an weeping angel

** 108. **no giving the Doctor sugar or caffeine, it does strange things to him

** 109.** we are not going to get a dog so stop asking!

**110. **you are not allowed to try and steal the TARDIS

**I do need more rules so please give me mor**

**I was thinking that I could put 10 rules per chapter, what do you think tell me in the reviews  
><strong>

**alright what do you think?. lets make the next chapter a themed one how about rules about the TARDIS's and the Doctor's birthday  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**Review or I get more crazy (too late)  
><strong>

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	20. 20 chapters AWESOME

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 18 100 RULES YAY!  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messege  
><strong>

**Helen Emrys: I think that you are suggesting ideas for the story and I like your ideas (BTW did you know that you are the person that has put in the most reviews for this Story! THANX!)  
><strong>

**Fai Gensu: I am hoping to get some more rules for the birthday special and I hope collage is treating you well  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**111. **do not deny Sec coffee (_He can be very scary when he wants to-Helen)_

**112. **do not provoke the wraith or the Goa'uld (_we do not want to start a war, the only thing keeping them from destroying the earth are us, the SGC and the Asgard)_

**113.**no using Replicators for lab experiments, it will only end in tears

**114.**the Doctor is not allowed to go on icanhascheezburger because like tvtropes he will not get off the internet for many days and we need the Doctor well rested so he can fly the TARDIS and save the Earth

**115. **if plan A does not work go on to plan B, if that does not work go down the alphabet until you get to a winner

**116.** you are not allowed to try and steal the sonic

**117.** Jack is not allowed to flirt with Helen because Sec will kill him again

**119.** Sec is allowed to give a his and Helen's child a Kaled last name (_Sec is now trying to find a good last name-Helen)_

**120.** Sec is not allowed to blow up the sun (_why?-Sec) (because we need a sun to stay alive-Rory)_

**I do need more rules so please give me more**

**also if i get enough reviews the next chapter will be the birthday special  
><strong>

**I was thinking that I could put 10 rules per chapter, what do you think tell me in the reviews  
><strong>

**alright what do you think?. lets make the next chapter a themed one how about rules about the TARDIS's and the Doctor's birthday  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**Review or I get more crazy (too late)  
><strong>

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	21. the first birthday

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 21 the birthday part 1  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messege  
><strong>

**Helen Emrys: I think that you are suggesting ideas for the story and I like your ideas (BTW did you know that you are the person that has put in the most reviews for this Story! THANX!)  
><strong>

**Fai Gensu: I am hoping to get some more rules for the birthday special and I hope collage is treating you well  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**121.**Nobody is allowed to play pin the tail on Sec because he would get most upset. (_trust me on this it is not very pretty thing he will chase you around the TARDIS- Captain Jack)_

**122. **If you must play hide and seek in The Tardis use a very large ball of string so you do not get lost. (_we did not see Mickey for 2 hours-Rory)_

**123.**Be very very carefull when playing a game of Twister. (_Always read the instructions first_-_Amy_)

**124. **do not hog the food and drink (_also do not get in between a hungry ex-dalek and the buffet, you will get killed by him, take it from me-Jack)_

**125.** do not drink too much alcohol (_Jack will flirt with everything with a pulse, Merlin and Doctor will try and build something with magic and River will flirt with the Doctor. and we have to do this twice a year-Rory)_

**126.** no spiking the punch

** 127.** check before cutting the cake (_turns out that the Doctor was hiding in there, fortunately he wasn't hurt to badly. why does he keep doing_ _that_?_-Rory_)

**128.** Arthur is not allowed to start an sword fight with Rory

**129.**Caan is not allowed to flirt with Gwen, Arthur will try and kill him (_poor bastard-Sec) _

**130.** no hiding in the cake (_Doctor is now not at risk of a double heart attack,let's try and keep him alive please-Sec) _

**I have finished the first birthday chapter so put in your ideas for the TARDIS chapter  
><strong>

**also if i get enough reviews the next chapter will be the birthday special  
><strong>

**I was thinking that I could put 10 rules per chapter, what do you think tell me in the reviews  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	22. the birthday part 2

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 22 the birthday part 2  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messege  
><strong>

**Helen Emrys: I think that you are suggesting ideas for the story and I like your ideas (BTW did you know that you are the person that has put in the most reviews for this Story! THANX!)  
><strong>

**Fai Gensu: I am hoping to get some more rules for the birthday special and I hope collage is treating you well  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**131. **Party games must be played (_a party is not a party without games-Doctor)_

**132.** when playing pinata when you are not playing do stay a few steps back (_Rory is now awake again, Sec is now_ hiding-Doctor)

**133.** food is a must (_we do not want to starve-Sec)_

**134.** no trying to re-gift, Doctor

**135.** no cheating on any of the party games

**136**. no strip poker (_why?-Jack) (Rory and Sec are not liking the way you are looking at Amy and Helen-Doctor)  
><em>

**137. **no trying to kill Jack

**138. **no trying to fly the TARDIS drunk

**139.** no trying to outsmart the Doctor at trivia because you will lose, badly

**140.** do not forget to wish the TARDIS and the Doctor a happy birthday

**I have finished the first birthday chapter so put in your ideas for the TARDIS chapter  
><strong>

**also if i get enough reviews the next chapter will be the birthday special  
><strong>

**I was thinking that I could put 10 rules per chapter, what do you think tell me in the reviews  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	23. new rules tonight

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 22 the birthday part 2  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messege  
><strong>

**Helen Emrys: I think that you are suggesting ideas for the story and I like your ideas (BTW did you know that you are the person that has put in the most reviews for this Story! THANX!)  
><strong>

**Fai Gensu: I am hoping to get some more rules for the birthday special and I hope collage is treating you well  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**141.** no going on thinkgeek (_I walked in on the Doctor and Rory laughing about something strange, when I asked about it they said "we are going to buy ALL the things" next thing I know the control room were filled with boxes'-Amy 'I only wanted a turret and cube plushie, then Doctor walks in and next thing we know...'-Rory_

**142.** If The Doctor must sing Christmas Carols not too loud '_Sec is still hiding in the Lab'- Helen_

**143. **The Doctor must not try to go back in time to Galifrey '_The Doctor remembers what he had to do to stop The Time War'- Rory_

**144.** Be very careful of Auntie, Uncle, Nephew and House if you end up on the junk planet.

**145.** Sec must not take Helen to Skaro for their honeymoon '_Sec was looking forword to showing Helen where he came from, but The Doctor would not allow it'-Helen_

**146.** The Doctor will ask before putting a christmas tree inside The Tardis '_Last year we all spent ages clearing up pine needles'- Rory and Amy_

**147. **_River really shouldn't make Sec beg for mercy. or any Dalek, as the Doctor might like it a little too much... (__my eyes they BURN'- Rory_

**148. **No playing kiss chase with The Doctor because River will definatly cause a scene if you do

**149.** The Doctor is an Alien from the planet Galifrey, he is not a wizard or anything like that

**150****.** no prodding Sec 

**here is a fact about rule 141 this has happened to me (the getting hooked on thinkgeek) srsy kids dont go on that site at school you will get in trouble**

**also Helen Emerys: I do not know who king Cenerd is and the character is with Sec (I do not have any plans to write any Camelot stories sry)  
><strong>

**I was thinking that I could put 10 rules per chapter, what do you think tell me in the reviews  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	24. rules and explations for Sec

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 22 the birthday part 2  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messege  
><strong>

**Helen Emrys: I think that you are suggesting ideas for the story and I like your ideas (BTW did you know that you are the person that has put in the most reviews for this Story! THANX!)  
><strong>

**Fai Gensu: I am hoping to get some more rules for the birthday special and I hope collage is treating you well  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**151.** when is camalot no drawing attention to the fact that King Cenerd is in love with Helen and that most of the women in Camelot are in love with Sec, Helen will try to us magic anyone who try's to get with her boyfriend/father of her child and Sec will use his job as Cenerd's adviser to get him to let go of his feelings for her '_Sec would be very good as a therapist, He has stopped a lot of fights on the TARDIS, guy's we need to make sure he stays on-board'-Rory_

**152.** If The Doctor does take The Tardis and his Companions back in time to Galifrey be very very carefull indeed. _'Does Galifrey still exist, I thought that you destroyed it?'-Amy 'yeah but when you the rebooted the universe you must have brought _Galifrey_, I think that you also brought back Sec as well'-Doctor 'thanks for that by the way'-Sec 'your welcome'-Amy_

**153.** Sec is to wear pants at all times

**154**. Sec is not allowed to cook anything

**155.** no trying to clone anyone, Sec we are looking at you

**156.** The Daleks are aloud to attend Sec and Helen's wedding they promise not to Extreminate anyone at all '_yay!'- Sec_

**157.** Sec is not allowed to try and see Skaro before the war

**158.** Sec is not allowed to pickpocket anyone

**159.** we are not getting any pets, so stop asking

**160****. **no trying to paint the TARDIS, she will paint you too in the same color as you painted her

**here is a fact about rule 141 this has happened to me (the getting hooked on thinkgeek) srsy kids dont go on that site at school you will get in trouble**

**also Helen Emerys: I do not know who king Cenerd is and the character is with Sec (I do not have any plans to write any Camelot stories sry)**

**alos I am sorry about what happend with rule 147 I derped up that rule and hopefluly this will not happen again  
><strong>

**I was thinking that I could put 10 rules per chapter, what do you think tell me in the reviews  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	25. a new chapter and a farewell, for now

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 22 the birthday part 2  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messege  
><strong>

**Helen Emrys: I think that you are suggesting ideas for the story and I like your ideas (BTW did you know that you are the person that has put in the most reviews for this Story! THANX!)  
><strong>

**Fai Gensu: I am hoping to get some more rules for the birthday special and I hope collage is treating you well  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**161**. no trying to sing any of the songs from glee _"__Doctor and the rest of the crew started singing ' Don't stop believing', Rory was a little off_ key"-_Helen_

**162. **no trying to get Sec overdosed on caffeine "_he can not yet handle that much caffeine yet and we need Sec alive__ so stop it"-Rory_

**163.** no snowball fights in the TARDIS "_I am still finding snow in my clothes, can we never do this again please"- Amy_

**164.**no trying to slip Sec any drugs "_Helen is catatonic, I cant get her to leave the med bay. I am kinda scared for her mental health, we need to take her back to Camelot"- Rory_

**165.** no pokeing Helen, it is not very nice

**166.** no trying to make a Green Lantern Ring, it is an invasion of their privacy to use their will power to fight crime

**167.** no trying to wake Sec up, you may make it worse than it was "_first thing Helen does after 1 week of being out of it, she injects Sec with some liquid"- Amy_

**168.** no trying to bring Helen out of her funk, she will use her magic on you

**169.** no poking Rory to see if he is still plastic, he will poke you harder "_and will start the Second poke war of the TARDIS"-Amy_

**170**. no blaming people for what happened to Sec, it will only make you look more guilty than you are

**don't worry Sec isn't Dead, He and Helen will be out of it for a few chapters so they can both recover from this event, so if you suggest any rules for those two it will be used for a future chapter, thanks **

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	26. new one tonight

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 22 the birthday part 2  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messege  
><strong>

**Helen Emrys: thanks for your many reviews of this story (everyone else take notes on her plz kthanx), The Human-Dalek baby has already been born before Sec went into his coma and he is currently awake and back on the TARDIS with his wife (I will give the Baby a name when i get a good idea/suggestion so everyone put in reviews thanx) I will be using you ideas in a future (if I ever get the inspiration), also thanks for your kind words about the stories  
><strong>

**Fai Gensu: I am hoping to get some more rules for the birthday special and I hope collage is treating you well  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**since it is summer holidays soon I will have more time to update  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**171.** No cheating when playing a game of chess because it will end in tears.

**172. **No doing handstands in the console room_ "Who knows what might happen"- Rory_

**173.** King Cenred is not allowed to flirt with Helen infront of Sec "_Sec tackled him and started punching him, I did not know he had it in him"- Rory_

**174.**No Skinny Dipping in the Tardis Swimming Pool _":("- Jack_

**175.** Alright Sec you are allowed to take Helen to Skaro "_yay!"-Sec_

**176.** No trying to kill Jack "_:)"-Jack_

**177.** Definatly no riding space hoppers in the Tardis because you could bounce too high and come down badly hurt _"my head hurts"-Rory_

**178. **No trying to kill anyone unless they try and kill you

**179.** Helen is not allowed to flirt with King Arthur and the Knights of Camelot _" Merlin and that Sec fellow are giving me strange looks"- Gwaine_

**180.** party hats are to be worn on heads not feet _"I don't want to kno__w"- Doctor_

**there another chapter done, now to go watch TobyGames **

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	27. the twins are introduced

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 22 the birthday part 2  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messege  
><strong>

**Helen Emrys: thanks for your many reviews of this story (everyone else take notes on her plz kthanx), The Human-Dalek baby has already been born before Sec went into his coma and he is currently awake and back on the TARDIS with his wife (I will give the Baby a name when i get a good idea/suggestion so everyone put in reviews thanx) I will be using you ideas in a future (if I ever get the inspiration), also thanks for your kind words about the stories  
><strong>

**Fai Gensu: I am hoping to get some more rules for the birthday special and I hope collage is treating you well  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**since it is summer holidays soon I will have more time to update  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**181.** No playing tiddly winks without wearing safety equiptment and reading the instructions

**182.** No playing games of conkers in The TARDIS _ "__My poor nose"-Sec_

**183.** no trying to take Tony and Leona without Sec or Helen's permission or they will end you

**184.** Christmas will be in Camelot because the Tardis takes The Doctor and all his Companions there, and so Helen and Sec will be able to show of the twins to her brother

**185.** When Sec takes Helen to Skaro the Daleks are not allowed to Exterminate them or anyone at all

**184.** no playing too much minecraft "_I can never look at bacon the same way again"-Rory_

**185.** no trying to break a Dalek "_Sec is quite protective of his test subjects"- River_

**186. **no trying to steal the twins toys "_what Jack wanted with a rattle, I never want to know"-Sec_

**187.** no singing 'power'

**188. **no playing drums around Doctor, he will think that he is going crazy and try and drop you off for your own safety

**189.** no singing still alive ,Doctor is still trying to forget the 'Portal' incident

**190.** no seeing if the TARDIS will run Crysis, you might crash the TARDIS

**there another chapter done, now to go watch TobyGames **

**alright another chapter done  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	28. 200 rules YES!

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 28 new chapter: more rules  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messege  
><strong>

**Helen Emrys: thanks for your many reviews of this story (everyone else take notes on her plz kthanx), The Human-Dalek baby has already been born before Sec went into his coma and he is currently awake and back on the TARDIS with his wife (I will give the Baby a name when i get a good idea/suggestion so everyone put in reviews thanx) I will be using you ideas in a future (if I ever get the inspiration), also thanks for your kind words about the stories  
><strong>

**Fai Gensu: I am hoping to get some more rules for the birthday special and I hope collage is treating you well  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**since it is summer holidays soon I will have more time to update  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**191.**Christmas Crackers can be pulled but make sure everyone wears safety goggles to protect their eyes _"we need to have a normal Christmas some time_"_-Amy_

**192.** Sec must do his fair share of nappy changes for Tony and Leona_"Must I?"-Sec_

**193. **No hiding in the Wardrobe in The Doctor's bedroom then jumping out shouting boo_"We need The Doctor alive"-The Tardis Crew_

**194.** No trying to kiss The Doctor without getting permission from River first

**195.** No buliding Snow Daleks or Snow Sec's "_drunk!Sec thought he had a clone army and tried to take over Camelot"-River_

**196.** no makeing 'I used to X but I took and arrow to the knee' _"what like_ _'I used to travel time and space but I took an arrow to the knee' why can't we?" - Doctor "or 'I used to be immortal but I took a miracle day to the knee'-Jac_

**197.** we are all very protective of the twins_ "King Cenred take note__"- Team__ TARDIS_

**198.** NO SINGING 'I JUST HAD SEX' WE DO NOT NEED TO KNOW, a fez on the door knob works just as well

**199.** no trying to make Rory into Spiderman, you may kill him with the radiation

**200.** no trying to break up the rad bromance of Doctor and Rory

**alright another chapter done  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	29. new rules right now

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 29 new chapter: more rules  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer message  
><strong>

**Fai Gensu: thanks for the rule, also where did you hear about the end of Amy and Rory?, no matter lets not get our tails in a knot over such trivial matters  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**since it is summer holidays soon I will have more time to update  
><strong>

relationships** in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**201.** No reminding the Doctor of the average fates of his companions; Amy and Rory are offically family now and he might do something drastic. We don't want them to end up like Jack

**202.** Sec must have a darkroom in The Tardis so his wedding photos can be developed

**203.** no mistletoe , we do not want a repeat of what happend with Amy and Sec alright

**204.** Sec is also allowed to have an sonic because he needs it for his experiments

**205.** no staring contest's, the longest one on record is 2 months between an weeping angel and a Dalek. we do not know how that started and we do not want to know how it ended

**206. **no trying to call the future of you, it will not end well

**207.** no editing Wikipedia with the future, spoilers

**208**. no trying to turn Sec back into a Dalek, Helen will kill you

**209.** do not play to much skyrim

**210.** do not try and give Amy, River and Helen superpowers

**alright another chapter done  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	30. 2 in one night, hell yeah

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 30 new chapter: more rules  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer message  
><strong>

**Fai Gensu: thanks for the rule, also where did you hear about the end of Amy and Rory?, no matter lets not get our tails in a knot over such trivial matters  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**since it is summer holidays soon I will have more time to update  
><strong>

relationships** in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**211.** No putting a photo of The Doctor on The Doctor's birthday cakes because there are two many photos to choose from and we don't want The Doctor to get Vain.

**212.** Amy and Rory do not want to leave The Doctor, Helen, Sec, Jack, Tony and Leona because its one big happy family that will have a hole in it if Amy and Rory leave _"we are a ohana and ohana means family"__ - The TARDIS ohana _

**213.** Morgana must not try and steal The Tardis because The Doctor is very protective of his TARDIS _"mine, RAWR"__-Doctor_

**214.** no strapping a lighting bolt to anyone during a storm and telling them to run to a pole and back

**215. **we are not you bitches Sec

**216****. **no quoting Firefly

**217.** no random dancing in the control room, you will end up hurting yourself

**218.** no trying fly the TARDIS with a blindfold, you will end up sending us somewhere not nice at all

**219. **Helen and Merlin Emrys are the last two dragon-lords, so do not and try and control and Dragons or you my be killed

**220.** no whipping your hair around, because you will hit someone with your hair 

**alright another chapter done  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**10 points to whoever gets the reference in 212  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	31. a new HumanDalek

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 31 a new Human-Dalek  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer message  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**since it is summer holidays soon I will have more time to update  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**221. **our motto is not "when in doubt use C4"

**222. **No flying The TARDIS into a blackhole you might never come out again.

**223.** No crossing your own timeline unless its a matter of life and death or an emergency.

**224**. No bouncy castles inside The Tardis.

**225.** Using Agravaine as a target in a snowball fight is a good idea(_aim for the head!, He betrayed me"- King Arthur_)

**226.** Sec is the only human-Dalek in existence "_I am glad of that fact, but it is very lonely... Doc I have too talk to you"-Sec_

**227.** Caan is new here so be nice to him

**228.** River is not allowed to flirt with Caan, he is still confused about having a Human body

**229.** Sec and Caan are allowed to have a man cave built so they can talk about how to adjust into human bodies and lives

**230.** The Doctor will let his Companions use the psychic paper as long as they give it back to The Doctor

**alright another chapter done  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**also what do you think about Caan, do you want him to stay in the story, also should I bring back the full cult of Skaro (10 points if you can name all of them)  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	32. portal crossover

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 31 a new Human-Dalek  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer message:**

**Doctor's new companion: thanks for all three reviews  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**since it is summer holidays soon I will have more time to update  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**231. **Caan is not allowed to steel the twins

**232.** no trying to steal Jack's Vortex manipulator

**233.** no trying to change the Earth's weather

**234.** King Cenred is the Ruler of Escetia,so no trying to take over that nation because we are trying to change he's public image so he will be a better King

**235.** no trying to prove God's existence or lack thereof

**236. **do not play Halo online for more than 10 hours, Your families are missing you guys

**237. **do not MST movies because it will annoy everyone else in the theater

**238.** do not play with any nerf guns, we do not want to start a second nerf war of the TARDIS

**239. **do not try and make your own stargate because you may create a black hole

**240.** do not try to punch through the walls of the Void to get Wheatley back from the moon because we will not be able to get him back to his dimension and he will be forced to stay with us

**alright another chapter done**

**should **Wheatley** stay in this story, if so put that in your reviews  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**also what do you think about Caan, do you want him to stay in the story, also should I bring back the full cult of Skaro (10 points if you can name all of them)  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	33. the christmas eve eve chapter

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 31 a new Human-Dalek  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer message:**

**Doctor's new companion: thanks for all three reviews  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**since it is summer holidays soon I will have more time to update  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**241. **no letting Wheatley play portal 2, he will try and hack it so he does not go to the moon

**242.** No interupting Sec when he is working in the lab unless its an emergency

**243.** Sec must not spend all day with Caan because Helen needs Sec's company and his help with the twins

**244.** no trying to make Amy a vampire, or a wizard

**225. **no forcing anyone to watch bad movies

**226. **no hooking up the TARDIS to the xbox to play skyrim _"or portal 2 __" -Amy_

**227.** no trying to take over the universe

**228****. **no trying to hook Wheatley up to the TARDIS, he will not want to because he does not want to kill you and become Evil

**229.** no spiking Rory's coffee because he is a mean drunk, the Doctor still can not look him in the eye

**230.** Sec is not aloud to sing any Justin Beiber because you will burst someone's eardrums with your high-pitched singing _  
><em>

**alright another chapter done**

**should **Wheatley** stay in this story, if so put that in your reviews**

**if any one wants to guess what happend in any of the rules so far put it in your reviews please  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**also what do you think about Caan, do you want him to stay in the story, also should I bring back the full cult of Skaro (10 points if you can name all of them)  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	34. the Christmas chapter

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 34 the Christmas one  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer message:**

**i have just finished watching the new Xmas special and has reminded me about the Xmas chapter, so i have decided to do it. wish me luck people  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**since it is summer holidays soon I will have more time to update  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**231.** no hogging the food at any of the feasts

**232.** we will not make fun of Wheatley because he can not eat any food because he will be very cross and shine he's flashlight in your eyes

**233.** no trying to put people under the mistletoe, it will only get really weird but your other halfs upset

**234.** no trying peak at your presents before they are opened because Sec will be very cross with you

**235.** no trying to get Doctor in a Santa suit because he is not built for that thing

**236.** no trying to bring back Donna's memories because we do not her head to explode "_too late, and I manged to stop the DoctorDonna so her head will not explode, merry Christmas Doctor_"**_ -_**_Sec "thanks Sec, merry Christmas"-Doctor _

**237.** no trying to build your own laser sonic because you may blow up the TARDIS

**238.** no trying to slip Caan any beer, because newely human/dalek hybrids are known for their poor skill and holding their beer and wine

**239. **no trying to reverse the polarity because you will do something very wrong

**240.** no trying to bring the Master back even though that he is probably less evil because of the lack of drums "_again, too late on that count, and he is actually pretty nice_"-_Sec "we really need to talk about your thing about bringing back old friends that are in other places, whats next? Rose and that clone of me?"- Dcotor "is Rose blond?"- Sec "yea" - Doctor "we might have a problem than" -Sec  
><em>

**alright another chapter done**

**should **Wheatley** stay in this story, if so put that in your reviews**

**if any one wants to guess what happend in any of the rules so far put it in your reviews please**

**do you like the fact that i allowed Donna to keep her memories of the Doctor**

**and that I just brought back Rose (I am trying to reverse Journeys end dont hate me for it plz)  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**also what do you think about Caan, do you want him to stay in the story, also should I bring back the full cult of Skaro (10 points if you can name all of them)  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	35. a returned to the old for now

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 35 a return to the old style for know  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer message:**

**i have just finished watching the new Xmas special and has reminded me about the Xmas chapter, so i have decided to do it. wish me luck people  
><strong>

**I have decided to do the birthday special next chapter, so get your ideas in for the next one. and the one after that will be Christmas**

**since it is summer holidays soon I will have more time to update  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**241.** no trying to find out how Sec manged to open a stable doorway to the other reality because you will get a huge headache and a sudden urge to drink lot's of beer, we need you sober

**242.** no trying to answer The Question

**243.** no trying to build your own Pandorica because the Doctor is still traumatized from by what happened the first time

**244.** no trying to steal Sec's Adipose because he needs them for his experiments

**245.** Orgys are not the solution for everything Jack

**246.** no suggesting that certain people should have a threesome and be done with it _" yeah you are giving Amy ideas"-Rory_

**247. **no trying to get the following high Rory _" who knew that he was so hyper when high"-Sec, _Amy _"she just watched songebob for eight hours and did not_ _make a single sound the whole time, we need to get her high more often"- Doctor, _River, Helen and Sec

**248.** do not try and get Amy drunk she will try and grope everyone besides River

**249.** no trying to give Amy magic because she will try and do very some strange things

**250.** no dancing along to 'sexy and I know it' you are traumatizing the Doctor

**alright another chapter done**

**if any one wants to guess what happend in any of the rules so far put it in your reviews please**

**Peace off**

**also what do you think about Caan, do you want him to stay in the story, also should I bring back the full cult of Skaro (10 points if you can name all of them)  
><strong>

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	36. new years eve chapter

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 35 a return to the old style for know  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer message:**

**helen emerys: where would be the fun in not bringing people back?, I may bring back a few more charcters (anyway the TARDIS is bigger on the inside LOL)**

**curls101: thanks and I will try and bring the "lols" as you put it**

**the Doctors other companion: it's all fun and games until someone becomes a Vampire **

** timespaceandme: I aim to please :)**

**and I will explian the concept of Points for my two stories on my profile so after this is posted go look there  
><strong>

**since it is summer holidays soon I will have more time to update  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**151.** No trying bribery to get something your desperate for it will only end in tears_ "Jack knows that only too well__"-Rory_

**152.** Safely first at all time even when flying The TARDIS

**153.** No trying to take over Torchwood because Jack is the boss and its his baby in a manor of speaking

**154.** efinatly no trying to retrive the Cyberking from the time vortex _"Its best to leave it there because it cannot harm anyone"- The Doctor_

**155. **No trying to remove the heart of The Tardis and put it in a human body_"The heart of The TARDIS must stay in The TARDIS"- The Docto__r_

**156.** Making sure that Sec doesn't keep bringing people back because The Tardis could become over crowded "_it's not my fault that my experiments end up bringing things back form other realities, death and the Void, that reminds me we need to give the treatmeant to Jast and Thay, Caan meet me in the lab we have work to do"-Sec_

**157.** No trying to beat Sec at chess because its his favourite game

**158.** no trying to kiss anyone you are not in a relationship at midnight one new years eve/day

**159.** Everyone must attend the wedding by order of Sec

**160.** When Helen, Sec and The Tardis Crew arrive on Skaro in The Tardis The Daleks are not allowed to Exterimate anyone at all _"haters gonna hate" -D__alek_

**alright another chapter done**

**if any one wants to guess what happend in any of the rules so far put it in your reviews please**

**also I may bring back that Dalek from an episode _all_ the way back in 2005 go and watch it for right now and then tell me what I should do with that character  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	37. first post for 2012

Rules** for the TARDIS**

**chapter 35 a return to the old style for know  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer message:**

**helen emerys: where would be the fun in not bringing people back?, I may bring back a few more charcters (anyway the TARDIS is bigger on the inside LOL)**

**curls101: thanks and I will try and bring the "lols" as you put it**

**the Doctors other companion: it's all fun and games until someone becomes a Vampire **

** timespaceandme: I aim to please :)**

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**161.** no trying to take Wheatley back to his reality because we could destroy the time/space vortex which would be a very bad thing

**162.** no making fun of Rory because he does not have as much Magic as his Wife or River

**163. **Amy is not aloud to out magic Helen or Merlin because you will lose badly

**164.** no trying to get everyone so drunk they black out because they do very weird things

**165.** no quoting red dwarf because it can very annoying

**166.** no trying to recreate the incident that brought back a Dalek from Utah because who knows what you will bring back this time

**167.** no trying to take any artifacts from warehouse 13 without asking the caretaker

**168. **no trying to steal any of the Doctor's things from his lab because you do not know what i safe and what is not and you will hurt yourself

**169.** no saying that Rory,Sec or the Doctor are whipped

**170.** no trying to fly the TARDIS without the Doctor's permission because the TARDIS will take you somewhere you do not want to go

**alright another chapter done**

**if any one wants to guess what happend in any of the rules so far put it in your reviews please**

**if you are wondering when Amy got magic, check out the other story sometime soon  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	38. new chapter tonight

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 35 a return to the old style for know  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer message:**

**guest: thanks, I have not played Assassins creed but I have seen a friend play the second one**

** TimeSpaceandMe: happy birthday for yesterday: as a present I give you another chapter of scribblings from the TARDIS tomorrow (because I do not have the Time today)**

** Helen Emery's: tomorrow I will upload a new chapter, for now please enjoy a new chapter of rules of the TARDIS **

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**171. **no trying to tease the Doctors clone because Rose will be very angry with you

**272. **no saying that the Doctor's clone is more cute than the current Doctor because the Doctor will get very sad

**273.** no trying to stop River from going to the Library because it is a Fixed Point in Time and trying to stop would be Bad

**274.** Doctor is not allowed to Troll Live-journal

**275.** no trying to tie the Doctor up so he can not interrupt your dates

**276. **no going onto quick-meme because you will not come off for many days

**277.** no spiking anyone's drinks because they will do very weird things

**278. **no trying to read anyone's mind because you might see some things you do not want to see

**279. **no trying to fly the TARDIS to the end of the universe because last time we went there it did not end well

**280. **no trying to turn anyone into a child

**alright another chapter done**

**if any one wants to guess what happend in any of the rules so far put it in your reviews please**

**if you are wondering when Amy got magic, check out the other story sometime soon**

**should I save River from her Fate? if so head over to the reviews and tell wither I should save her amd while your there please leave me some rules thanx  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	39. a new one right now

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 35 a return to the old style for know  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer message:**

**ZoeyXWitch: thanks for noticing that I will be using Rose, Donna and the Master in this chapter  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**281.** when in the same room as the Master do not tap out the drums because he will try and kill you

**282.** we must not draw attention to Amy's skirt or lack thereof

**283.** Jack is NOT available for sexual favours

**284.** When Amy and Rory are in fancy dress, it is wise to leave them alone for a few hours (the Doctor does not wish to be scarred for life. Again. Even if they did ask him if he wanted to join in)

**285.** you must never knock four times on the TARDIS door. It unnerves people

**286.** no teaseing Amy or Donna about their hair color because the TARDIS is on their side and they will get their Revenge

**287.** youare not allowed to declare "Hug a Dalek" day

**288.** do not try and kill Rory because Amy will try to kill you

**289. **no saying Smeg when ever something goes wrong because Sec,Helen and Caan would not understand the reference

**290. **no trying to steal any thing from Torchwood 3 because Jack is very defensive about it

**alright another chapter done**

**if any one wants to guess what happend in any of the rules so far put it in your reviews please**

**if you are wondering when Amy got magic, check out the other story sometime soon**

**should I save River from her Fate? if so head over to the reviews and tell wither I should save her amd while your there please leave me some rules thanx  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	40. 300 RULES HELL YEAH!

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 35 a return to the old style for know  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer message:**

**Helen Emerys: Don't worry River will be saved from being uploaded into the Library's system in the next chapter of scribblings from the TARDIS  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get his story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor and Sec/OC  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**291.** no going on TvTropes because you will not be seen for many days and we will start to miss you

**292.** no trying to give Caan nightmares because he will crawl into bed with Sec and Helen and they need there sleep

**293.** no trying to fly the TARDIS nude because you may distract your copilot and he/she may crash the TARDIS

**294.** when at Warehouse 13 do not touch anything because you do not know what it will do and we have only just turned Rory back to his normal color

**295.** no trying to take over the Earth, even if you promise that you will not kill the population

**296.** no trying to take anyone's food because they are very defensive of their food

**297. **no using the TARDIS in any races against any aliens because you may lose

**298.** what happens in the TARDIS stays in the TARDIS

**299.** when hanging out with Sherlock do not try and out-deduce him because he will beat you

**300. **do not question the Master's and Moriarty's friendship because they will try and kill you

**alright another chapter done**

**if any one wants to guess what happend in any of the rules so far put it in your reviews please**

**if you are wondering when Amy got magic, check out the other story sometime soon**

**should I save River from her Fate? if so head over to the reviews and tell wither I should save her amd while your there please leave me some rules thanx  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	41. 41 chapters FTW

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 35 a return to the old style for know  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer message:**

**Curls101: yeah I blame tumbler for the Ideas of Wholock (just be grateful that I did not make this Sherlock/Amy)**

**Helen Emerys: think of River coming back from the dead as an early birthday pressie  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**301.** no trying to get the TARDIS into the drive thru because the cashier will not know how to deal with it and may pass out

**302.** no trying to get Sherlock and John into a relationship because you have a bet to win

**303.** no trying to get Sherlock to fly the TARDIS because you will not know where he will take you

**304.** Helen is not aloud to try and get information about her presents because we will not tell

**305.**no breaking out into song. we want the rest of the universe to think we are sane

**306.** no making Rory test out his apparent immortality because Jack will get jealous of him

**307.** no trying to see if Skyrim is a real place because you will fail

**308.** no trying to hide Batman: Arkham City because Amy and Helen will try and kill you

**309.** no trying to summon a Dragon because the Doctor is afraid of them

**310.** no trying to get the Doctor to play a war game, he will not do it and be very cross with you

**alright another chapter done**

**if any one wants to guess what happend in any of the rules so far put it in your reviews please**

**if you are wondering when Amy got magic, check out the other story sometime soon**

**should I save River from her Fate? if so head over to the reviews and tell wither I should save her amd while your there please leave me some rules thanx  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	42. oneshot tiem nao!

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 35 a return to the old style for know  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer message:**

**Helen Emerys:HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Here is your present (besides River) a oneshot! hope you enjoy  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also sorry if this one-shot stinks, I am not very good a grammar  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

****Helen was upset, She knew she should not be. She had a happy family, had fun with the Doctor and it was her birthday. She was upset because the Doctor was upset, He hid it well but he could not hide the Sadness that was in his eyes when ever Amy or Rory asked him about River. when Amy had found out about the Library she had become sad and had not left her room for a week, adding to the general mood in the TARDIS was that Sherlock Holmes was dead, but even with all her power she could not bring back the dead so she went to her party.

After a few hours of Doctor trying not to talk to Amy or Rory and just being in the corner Helen was sick of it, Sec and Caan were siting in at one of the corners talking about some science thing and Sec was using anything within reach to show how he could rebuild the time-scoop without destroying the TARDIS, even Wheatley had noticed something was wrong. As she went to go tell Sec that she was gonna turn in for the night when she noticed something odd with the him, he was not making a sound, he was not even breathing She was about to go get the Doctor when she saw two people in the room she herd a male voice say "I told you we would wind up her soon enough " while the Woman who Helen could only see the back of nodded and said "what about Sherlock?", when Helen heard the mystery woman speak she almost passed out. for that was the voice of River Song

Helen then spoke up "River is that you?" and the Man who had been talking to River jumped slightly and said " how are you not frozen?, I did not write this? oh wait yes I did" he had a huge smile when he said that " you might be wondering who I am Helen, I am the Wander. I am the Writer of your tale" he was making no sense and Helen only knew one person who had a name like that so she told him "Are you related to the Doctor?, because you two seem very alike" the Wander chuckled at that "no, I am not related to him but i Have met him before, Im just here to drop of River and then I'm going to go save Sherlock, Well see you around Helen tell the Doctor I said hello" and with that the Wander vanished with a flash of light. Helen was staring at where he was standing when she heard River ask her

"So how is the Doctor then?"

**first one-shot done tell me how it went thanx**

**alright another chapter done**

**if any one wants to guess what happend in any of the rules so far put it in your reviews please**

**if you are wondering when Amy got magic, check out the other story sometime soon**

**should I save River from her Fate? if so head over to the reviews and tell wither I should save her amd while your there please leave me some rules thanx  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	43. another chapter like right now

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 35 a return to the old style for know  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer message:**

**Helen Emerys:HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Here is your present (besides River) a oneshot! hope you enjoy  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also sorry if this one-shot stinks, I am not very good a grammar  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**311.** no writing "Bad Wolf' around the TARDIS because Rose will have to clean it up

**312.** no trying to look into the heart of the TARDIS because the last person who did that almost died

**313. **Jack is not allowed to look into the heart of the TARDIS because we do not know what will happen

**314.** no quoting My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic because you will get very strange looks from the rest of us 

**315. **no trying to bring back the dead, because it will not end will

**316.** if you do raise the dead, we are not going to help you unless it is a threat to the universe

**317.** no trying to figure out how Sherlock or River came back from the dead because you will go insane over it

**318.** no trying to go to the end of the universe because you might not be able to get back

**319.** no trying to fly the TARDIS without shields because you may hit a past version of the Doctor and destroy the time-space vortex

**320.** no trying to bring back Davros because he will not be very happy with the fact you got Caan before him

**alright another chapter done**

**if any one wants to guess what happend in any of the rules so far put it in your reviews please**

**if you are wondering when Amy got magic, check out the other story sometime soon**

**should I save River from her Fate? if so head over to the reviews and tell wither I should save her amd while your there please leave me some rules thanx  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	44. warehouse 13 crossover

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 35 warehouse 13 crossover  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**Fai Gensou: welcome back!,any new rules  
><strong>

** Doctors other companion: yeah she has been for a while,the only reason i have not mentined Her before is that I could not find any rules for her**

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also sorry if this one-shot stinks, I am not very good a grammar  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**320.** If you find a Artifact you are to give it to the Warehouse as soon as possible

**321. **No trying to spike the punch bowl because you will not know how we will react

**322.** no trying to use Artifacts for your own means because it will bite you on the butt

**323.** the Doctor is not allowed to Hack into the warehouse because Artie will not be happy with us

**324. **no trying to open a oblivion gate because you do not know what will come out

**325.** no trying to recreate miracle day because it may cause the end of the world

**326.** no going on quickmeme because you might get a virus

**327.** even though Pete and Myka now travel with us we are not allowed to try and get together

**328****. **no trying to steal anything from global dynamics because the government will try and arrest us

**329.** no trying to use memes to justify actions

**330.** no going to concerts and telling people how there career will end

**alright another chapter done**

**sorry for all the warehouse 13 Rules I have borrowed Season 1 and are watching it while I am writing this  
><strong>

**if any one wants to guess what happend in any of the rules so far put it in your reviews please**

**if you are wondering when Amy got magic, check out the other story sometime soon**

**should I save River from her Fate? if so head over to the reviews and tell wither I should save her amd while your there please leave me some rules thanx  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	45. more crossovers

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 35 warehouse 13 crossover  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**Fai Gensou: welcome back!,any new rules for me?**

**Curls101: thanks for the rule (got any more?)  
><strong>

**Helen Emerys: I like these rules you are giving me  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also sorry if this one-shot stinks, I am not very good a grammar  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**331.** Doctor is not aloud an Xbox live account, things get messy on chat. (_Take the advice, you don't want him turning up to your house in 20 years time complaining how you head-shot him on MW3-Rory_

**332.** no trying to give HG Wells her memory back because the Regents must have had their reasons _(too late Myka forced me to do it-Sec)_

**333.** no trying to bring back the warehouse _(again too late__, they caught me while I was __sleeping-__Sec) ( I am going to have to give you a list am I?-Doctor)_

**334.** no trying to hook up any artifacts to the TARDIS because we do no know how the TARDIS will react to them

**335.** if you ever find MacPherson do not tell him his future because he will try and change it

**336.** no trying to Hack the government becuase you will get in trouble

**337.** you are not trying to Drug anyone because it is a very bad thing to do to someone

**338.** if you do visit the Warehouse ask before you take any cookies form Artie's desk

**339.** no trying to use HG 's time machine without her permission because only she knows how to use it and you could end up anywhere in time

**340.** you are aloud to tell Artie where the first 12 warehouses are

**alright another chapter done**

**sorry for all the warehouse 13 Rules I have borrowed Season 1 and are watching it while I am writing this and I blame Tumbler for the recent Warehouse 13 rules  
><strong>

**if any one wants to guess what happend in any of the rules so far put it in your reviews please**

**if you are wondering when Amy got magic, check out the other story sometime soon**

**should I save River from her Fate? if so head over to the reviews and tell wither I should save her amd while your there please leave me some rules thanx  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	46. Chapter 46

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 35 warehouse 13 crossover  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**Fai Gensou: welcome back!,any new rules for me?**

**Curls101: thanks for the rule (got any more?)  
><strong>

**Helen Emerys: I like these rules you are giving me  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also sorry if this one-shot stinks, I am not very good a grammar  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**341.** no auto tuning the Cybermens voices '_why? they sound so awesome and they are not complaining about it-Sec'_

**342.** no useing LA noire to learn how to see when someone is lying

**343. **no trying to do anything you see in saints row the third because we want to be liked by people

**344.** no trying to fly the TARDIS without the Doctors help because you might kill a lot of People

**345. **no trying to get Claudia to Hack the TARDIS because she might activate a subroutine which will put the TARDIS in lockdown

**346.** no trying to get Jinks to play LA noire to see if he could get a good rank in it, because he will get very smug

**347.** no going back to LA and trying to see if team bondi got it right

**348.** no trying to fly the TARDIS blindfolded because you will end up some where strange

**349.** no trying to kill Sec because Helen will try to kill you

**350.** no trying to hook up the TARDIS to your XBOX because the XBOX will explode

**alright another chapter done**

**sorry for all the warehouse 13 Rules I have borrowed Season 1 and are watching it while I am writing this and I blame Tumbler for the recent Warehouse 13 rules  
><strong>

**if any one wants to guess what happend in any of the rules so far put it in your reviews please**

**if you are wondering when Amy got magic, check out the other story sometime soon**

**should I save River from her Fate? if so head over to the reviews and tell wither I should save her amd while your there please leave me some rules thanx  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	47. last chapter before school

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 35 warehouse 13 crossover  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**Fai Gensou: welcome back!,any new rules for me?**

**Curls101: thanks for the rule (got any more?)  
><strong>

**Helen Emerys: I like these rules you are giving me  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

also** sorry if this one-shot stinks, I am not very good a grammar  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**351.** no trying to hook up a laptop to the TARDIS because it will explode

**352. **no trying to use the TARDIS to refuel the Destiny because it could overload and destroy both ships

**353.**no trying to wire DHD into the TARDIS because it might cause the stargate to overload and destroy the planet

**354.** no betting about anything

**355.** no making a still on the TARDIS because we want you sober

**356. **no giving Amy,Sec,Caan or Helen a lot of sugar because the combined sugar rush will be catastrophic

**357.** no trying to bring back the Time Lord Victorious because we do not want the Doctor to go crazy and try to rewrite time

**258.** no trying to power a Stargate with the TARDIS because we will not be able to shut it off and it might suck in the entire planet

**259.** no trying to put the Doctor in a human body because River will try and kill you

**260.** no trying to take over someones mind because it is not a nice thing to do

**alright another chapter done**

**sorry for all the warehouse 13 Rules I have borrowed Season 1 and are watching it while I am writing this and I blame Tumbler for the recent Warehouse 13 rules  
><strong>

**if any one wants to guess what happend in any of the rules so far put it in your reviews please**

**if you are wondering when Amy got magic, check out the other story sometime soon**

**should I save River from her Fate? if so head over to the reviews and tell wither I should save her amd while your there please leave me some rules thanx  
><strong>

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	48. the return tonight

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 35 warehouse 13 crossover  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**Fai Gensou: welcome back!,any new rules for me?**

**Curls101: thanks for the rule (got any more?)  
><strong>

**Helen Emerys: I like these rules you are giving me  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**361**.When a new video game comes out, no hogging it please. It's not polite. And may lead to you losing 'dancing' priviledges. _'__Are men allowed to do that?-Amy__'_ _'NO-River_'

**362.** No hogging the XBox games console it will only end in tears

**363.** no trying to google TARDIS on the internet because you may end up with some explaining to do

**364.** when Sherlock asks for a smoke you do not give him one!

**365.** no getting in a fight with Watson because you will get your pride destroyed by him

**366.** no trying to use Sec's lab without his permission because something will blow up

**367.**no trying to use the rift to charge your phone because you may open up something you can not close

**368.** no using Molly to get drugs cheap

**369.** no trying to stop Sherlock from going to the Reichenbach falls because it is a fixed point in time

**370.** no trying to bring Irene Adler into the TARDIS because we don't want River and her to start planning anything

**alright another chapter done**

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	49. double update YAY!

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 35 warehouse 13 crossover  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**Fai Gensou: welcome back!,any new rules for me?**

**Curls101: thanks for the rule (got any more?)  
><strong>

**Helen Emerys: I like these rules you are giving me  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also I have taken some rules from TimeandSpaceandMe  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**371.** No getting Sherlock to explain why he is married to his job because it will take up the best part of a day

**372.** Helen must not snog Sherlock and Watson because Sec can get very Jealous and upset _' yeah Sec__ just walked up and punched them both in the gut, pretty impressive'- Rory_

**373.** No bringing Moriarty into The Tardis because he will try and take over

**374.** no getting a dog because it will shed hair all over the control room _' also we already have a dog, ME!'-K9_

**375.** no trying to start a TARDIS rave because it will get out of hand

**376.** Pond related innuendos are NOT funny

**377.** The Torchwood Rift is not a shortcut to Disney-Land Clom

**378. **no singing Disney songs randomly _'Doctor started singing "ill make a man out of you" to Rory, kinda fitting'-Amy_

**379.** No cat fights, they tend to end with shredded clothes and everyone staring at the people involved in a weird perverted way

**380.** Donna and Amy are not to have the "Ultimate Battle of the Gingers"

**alright another chapter done**

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	50. 50 chapters YAY!

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 50**

**50 chapters HECK YES!  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**Fai Gensou: welcome back!,any new rules for me?**

**Curls101: thanks for the rule (got any more?)  
><strong>

**Helen Emerys: I like these rules you are giving me  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also I have taken some rules from TimeandSpaceandMe**

**I may be putting a few new OCs in my story, anyone who has a suggestion for a OC PM me with the following information**

** 1. name**

**2. apperence **

**3. personalty **

****4. relationships with the other characters**  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**381.** no making John think Sherlock is dead because he will get depressed

**382. **no making Rory think that Amy is dead because he will slip into the 'The Lone Centurion' and he is very scary like that

**383.** The Doctor and Jack are not to go bar hopping – only bad things come from this

**384.** The Doctor is the Lord of Time, not Lord of the Dance (floor)

**385.** No Easter egg hunts

**386.** No truth or dare in the TARDIS it will only end in tears

**387.** Under no circumstances is Who'd you rather (Timey-Wimey version) to be played on the TARDIS

**388.** No randomly bringing back other Time-lords from the Time war. They are still angry with The Doctor for putting them in the time-lock, and now The Master as well for sending them back into said time-lock

**389.** no trying to break Amy and Rory up before they start traveling with us because you will no know what will happen to them in that new timeline

**390.** no singing any of the Trock songs

**alright another chapter done**

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	51. new one today

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 51 more rules  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**Fai Gensou: welcome back!,any new rules for me?**

**Curls101: thanks for the rule (got any more?)  
><strong>

**Helen Emerys: I like these rules you are giving me  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also I have taken some rules from TimeandSpaceandMe, and Tatyana Witwicky, thanks to all my reviewers and people I have taken Inspiration from  
><strong>

**I may be putting a few new OCs in my story, anyone who has a suggestion for a OC PM me with the following information**

** 1. name**

**2. apperence **

**3. personalty **

****4. relationships with the other characters**  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**391.** you may not use the TARDIS as a giant stereo system.

**392.** no qouteing gumball

**.**Are you aware that your husband isn't wearing any pants?

**. **Ahhhhh! Paranormal activity! (River walked in on Amy and Rory having _relations)_

**.** I'm a predator, hear me roar! *Meow*

**.** There are no words to express the pains that I feel right now (after a explosion set the Doctors hair alight)

**393.** When the emergency alarm goes off, never do or say the following:*'Nobody panic! Nobody panic! Just follow these simple instructions...crap, where'd I put them?'  
>*'I never said they would never find us, I recall saying that it would take longer..'<br>*'Who's in charge here?' Then answer by pointing to the opposite person and/or bot. (Will and Dad.)(That really made me laugh.)  
>*'Anyone know how to turn this thing off?'<br>*Once again, finding a virgin to sacrifice.

**394. **Never quote Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs!

*'It's okay! It's just pain!'  
>*'You know what you are, Sec? A shenaneganizer!'<br>*'My chest hairs are tingling! Something's wrong!'  
>*'I shouldn't be running with these!'<br>*'Alright. This probably...won't explode.'  
>*'My forecast? Sunny side up<p>

**395.** Never start Quoting the Big Bang Theory.

*'If it's "creepy" to use the Internet, military satellites, and robot aircraft to find a house full of gorgeous young models so I can drop in on them unexpected, then FINE, I'm "creepy".  
>*'I'm not insane! My mother had me tested!'<br>*'I'm polymerized tree sap and you're an inorganic adhesive, so whatever verbal projectile you launch in my direction is reflected off of me, returns to its original trajectory and adheres to you.' (  
>*'If by "Holy Smokes", you mean a derivative restatement of the kind of stuff you could find scribbled on the wall of any men's room at MIT, sure.'<br>*'I don't know your odds in the world as a whole, but as far as the population of this TARDIS goes, you're a veritable mac daddy.'  
>*'It must be so humbling to suck in so many different levels.'<br>*'Hello Oompa Loompas of science!'  
>*'How come on Star Trek everybody's private parts are the same? No alien lady ever told Captain Kirk, "Hey, get your thing out of my nose".'<br>*'They were not "friends". They were imaginary colleagues.'  
>*'I don't care what the bosoms say. I just want to be part of the conversation.' (Jack)<br>*'I thought it was pretty a good one. I gave him an "LOL."  
>*'On the other hand, I think Caan will evolve into the larval form of his species. He'll wrap himself up in a cocoon and, two months later, will emerge with moth wings and an exoskelton.'<br>*'But everyone loves LOLcats. They're cute, and they can't spell, because they're cats.'*'Photographic memory is a misnomer. The correct term is eidetic memory, as I've told you countless times, like in May 7th during lunch. You complained your turkey was dry.'  
>*'I have selective mutism, a recognized medical condition. You're just a douche!'<br>*'Is the sex starting now?'  
>*'To this day, I can't look at pickled herring without being a little aroused and ashamed.'<br>*'I do not have to urinate. I am master of my own bladder.' (A slight pause later.) 'Drat!'  
>*'Yes, because nothing's cooler and more fearsome than a man with a shirt blasting music from between his nipples.' (No idea why Rory found it necessary for Sec to make him a shirt that makes music.)<br>*'Hello? I know you're out there. I can hear you metabolizing oxygen and expelling carbon dioxide!'  
>*'Oh, and one more thing, if you use my toothbrush, I will jump out that window."<br>*'Oh and one more thing...it's on bitch.'  
>*'I gotta run. If you come up with an adjective, go ahead and text me.'<br>*'You laugh now, you just wait until you need tech support.'  
>*'Lift up the camera! I'm looking at his crotch!'<p>

**396.** Quotes from Gex are banned because apparently, they annoy Sec and Rory

*'A little tongue now, a lotta tail later..(Ratchet was giggling at that.)(Ew..gross..ew.)  
>*'I taste dog doody!'<br>*'Believe me, you smell like I feel!' (Simmons aced that joke by doing an arm pit check.)('What, moist and hairy?')(Nastily hilarious!)  
>*'They're sweet! They're minty! They mumble!' (Dad seriously made me laugh that day!)(He knows how to cheer me up.)<br>*'File this under 'Ouch.'  
>*'I am the God of Hellfire!'<br>*'Pee-u! I am a walking Dutch Oven!'  
>*'Say Hello to the floor!'<br>*'I'm flaming!...In the MANLY way...  
>*'Lord Vader, I am MAD for your tailor!'<br>*'My Inner child is coming out and it HURTS!'

**397.**Never say the following just because it's funny.

*'I may have schizophrenia but at least I still have each other!'  
>*' If at first you don't succeed..destroy all evidence that you tried!'<br>*'If at first you DO succeed...try not to look so astonished!'  
>*'I used to have an open mind...but my brain kept falling out!'<br>*'Follow your dreams...except the ones when you're at school in your underwear.'

**398.** Quotes from Jimmy Neutron, be it the show or the movie, are not good to say randomly.

*'You heard the man, stop sucking your thumbs and let's light this candle!'

*'Some of the greatest inventors of all time started out as complete failures too.'

*'Y'know, Milwaukee has very clean restrooms.'

*'If we get blown up, whatever's left of me is kicking your butt'

**399.** no posting anything from another planet on twitter because it will be very hard to explain to your family

**400.** Never quote anything from the show 'The Good guys.'

*'This car is pretty good for it's model. It went from 0 to living room in a few seconds.'

*'Wanna sniff the backseat, check to see if there's any fluids."

*'"If I could make myself less attractive to hot, young women, don't you think I'd do it?"

*'One day you're a cop the next day you're a guy who failed a urine test."

*'Dammit! This shirt was supposed to last me another six weeks."

*'We're on the five-yard line. I can feel it tingling in my loins."

*'Look at his face, it's got "yeah, sure, I'll be the wife" written all over it.'

*'Women are like kittens. They just wanna be taken care of.

*'After she took your manhood, where did she put it? Did she put it in a jar or something?'

*'We gotta get some medicine for the computer machine!

**alright another chapter done**

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	52. double update again

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 51 more rules  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**Fai Gensou: welcome back!,any new rules for me?**

**Curls101: thanks for the rule (got any more?)  
><strong>

**Helen Emerys: I like these rules you are giving me  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also I have taken some rules from TimeandSpaceandMe, and Tatyana Witwicky, thanks to all my reviewers and people I have taken Inspiration from**

**also sorry if I have stolin rules from, I have run out of Ideas so hopefully I will get some ideas soon  
><strong>

**I may be putting a few new OCs in my story, anyone who has a suggestion for a OC PM me with the following information**

** 1. name**

**2. apperence **

**3. personalty **

****4. relationships with the other characters**  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**401.**Never start quoting Invader Zim.

*'Tell me a story about giant pigs!'

*'No, I - Wait... What do eyes have to do with breathing?' (Oh Caan ...so uneducated about the human body in so many ways.)

*'What's wrong with you? All you talk about is aliens and ghosts and seeing Bigfoot in your garage!'

*'Awww... I wanted to explode.'

*Children, your performance was miserable. Your parents will all receive phone calls instructing them to love you less now.'

*All I wanted was to have some pizza, hang out with dad, and not let your weirdness mess up my day!'

*'Fire some kinda laser... thingie at 'em; RIGHT NOW!'

*'Hi floor! Make me a sandwich!

*'Lemony fresh victory shall be mine!'

*'But I _need_ tacos! I need them or I will explode. That happens to me sometimes...'

*'Why was there BACON IN THE SOAP?'

**402.** Never tell Sec about the El Chupacabra, Bigfoot, The Mothman, or any other supernatural creature

**403.** Once again, this is awesome by the way, do NOT quote Whose line!

*'Don't mess with the neon love chicken!'  
>*'If you loved me, you'd swallow it.'<br>*'Oh, sorry, one of your eyebrows fell off.'  
>*'...Now, how do we put the leopard back together?'<br>*'I spent all night making those frilly pink uniforms, and I expect you boys to wear them!'  
>*'They're nipples, identical nipples...'<br>*'Hello, I'm Suzy the Vagina.'  
>*'From the time I was born to the time I was died, and then I was reincarnated and came back as this, bowling has been a big part of my life. Sure, it's not really a sport, but it's got great music attached to it!'<br>*'That was so beyond crap that it would take a spaceship 15 years to get to a planet close enough to look through a telescope at the crap it was.'  
>*'I have bruised my dynamic duo!'<br>*'Does this shirt make me look kind of boxy?'  
>*'Oh yeah it was. Would have been better if your head burst into flames. That would have been neat.'<p>

**404.** error rule not found

**405.**Once again, quotes from Mystery Science Theater 3000 are discouraged.

*'What's a giant eye going to do, pick you up and wink you to death?' (dont tease the Atraxi)*'They just put a bunch of movies in a blender and pressed the 'Mix' button!'  
>*'Um... hakuna matata?'<br>*'Oh I love going to Bar. I usually order sandwich and have drink.'

*'Dude, she's retracting her neck like a turtle.'

*'Doctor, I think the Drums in my head are a little louder than usual.' (Oh Master..)

*'Whoa! A creature whose face is 80% eyebag.'  
>*'Every male of <em>any<em> species has the biological urge to panty-raid.'  
>*'Guys, just skip the music and go right to the heroin.'<p>

*'It's good to know that the future has CONSTANT ORGAN MUSIC!'  
>*'Oh, great! You just shot down Air Force One, you dope!'<p>

*'Hey, you can throw things through Dad! I'm gonna get an anvil!'  
>*'It's like they have two servings of tension yet they're trying to stretch it out for seven people.'<br>*'So, she threatened him with sex?'  
>*'I've been diagnosed coo-coo.'<br>*'Boy, Rod's a strong blip on my gaydar.'  
>*'Haha, I'm bleeding internally!'<p>

**406. **no trying to lock people in the theater and make them watch bad movies

**407.**Absolutely NO smoking.

**408****. **Quotes from portal are are discouraged as well.

*"Spectacular. You seem to understand how a portal affects forward momentum, or to be more precise, how it does not. Momentum, a function of mass and velocity, is conserved between portals. In layman's terms, speedy thing goes in, speedy things goes out."

*"The Enrichment Center promises to always provide a safe testing environment. In dangerous testing environments, the Enrichment Center promises to always provide useful advice. For instance, the floor here will kill you. Try to avoid it."

*"Unbelievable. You, [insert name of various person or bot here], must be the pride of [place of resident be it city, state, or planet]!"

*"The Enrichment Center reminds you that the Companion Cube cannot speak. In the event that the Companion Cube does speak, the Enrichment Center urges you to disregard its advice."

*"You're kidding me. Did you just stuff that Aperture Science Thing-We-Don't-Know-What-It-Does into an Aperture Science Emergency Intelligence Incinerator?"

*"Two plus two is f-f-f-f... ten...in base four; I'm fine!" (Heat stroke is a very bad thing for people)

*"That thing you burned up isn't important to me. It's the fluid catalytic cracking unit. It made shoes for orphans. Nice job breaking it, hero."

*"Do you think I'm trying to trick you with reverse psychology? I mean, seriously, now.

*"Let's be honest. Neither one of us knows what that thing does. Just put it in the corner and I'll deal with it later."

*"The Enrichment Center reminds you that the Weighted Companion Cube will never threaten to stab you and, in fact, cannot speak."

*"Where are we going? Are you coming back? What's that noise? Is that a gun? Do you smell something burning? Ooooohh... what's in heeeere?"

*"Did you know you can donate one or all of your vital organs to the Aperture Science Self Esteem Fund for Girls? It's true!"

*"Remember, the Aperture Science Bring Your Daughter to Work Day is the perfect time to have her tested."

*"I've been *really* busy being dead. You know, after you *murdered* me!" (Davros to John)

*"Okay, listen, we should get our stories straight, alright? If anyone asks - and no one's gonna ask, don't worry - but if anyone asks, tell them as far as you know, the last time you checked, everyone looked pretty much alive. Alright? Not dead."

*"If you feel liquid running down your neck, relax, lie on your back, and apply immediate pressure to your temples. You are simply experiencing a rare reaction in which the Material Emancipation Grill may have emancipated the ear tubes inside your head."

*"Most people emerge from suspension terribly undernourished. I want to congratulate you on beating the odds and somehow managing to pack on a few pounds."

*"Alright, I've been thinking. When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give me lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!"

*"Look at you, soaring through the air like an eagle... piloting a blimp."

*"The square root of rope is string."

*"I'll tell ya, it's times like this I wish I had a waist so I could wear all my black belts. Yeah, I'm a black belt. In pretty much everything. Karate. Larate. Jiu Jitsu. Kick punching. Belt making. Taekwondo. Bedroom."

*"Aaah! Bird! Bird! Bird! Bird!"

*"If I were you, I'd take a deep breath. And hold it."

*"The testing area's just up ahead. The quicker you get through, the quicker you'll get your sixty bucks."

**409.**Don't go to Amy's iPod Touch for a quote of the day.

*'It is discouraging to try and pentrate a mind like yours. You ought to get it out and dance on it. That would take some of the rigidity out of it.'  
>*'The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin.'<br>*'You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm.'  
>*'Silence is golden when you can't think of a good answer.'<br>*'I know where we're going, I just don't know where it IS!'  
>*'Life is God's joke on us. It's our mission to figure out the punchline.'<br>*'Another belief of mine: that everyone else my age is an adult, whereas I am merely in disguise.'  
>*'Cold? If the thermometer had been an inch longer we'd all have frozen to death!'<br>*'I simply cannot understand the passion that some people have for making themselves thoroughly uncomfortable and then boasting about it afterwards.'  
>*'Be careful - with quotations you can damn anything.' (<br>*'I have found you an argument, I am not obliged to find you an understanding.'  
>*'It may be five years from now, but at some point we'll be better than them.' (<br>*'Never miss a chance to keep your mouth shut.'  
>*'Of course the game is rigged. Don't let that stop you - if you don't play, you can't win.'<br>*'The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka' (I found it) but 'That's funny...''

**410.** No one is allowed to quote Over the Hedge starting as of right now.

*"Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on. The what is what?"

*"There, there, that's where the squirrel attacked us, and he had like rabies or something, and then there was this gross, naked amphibian thing..."

*"No biggy! OHHH! That is what we call a biggy!"

*"That, my friend, is a magical combination of corn flour, dehydrated cheese solids, BHA, BHT, and good old MSG; a.k.a., the chip, nacho cheese flavor."

*"The base location contract, which you signed, says the grass is supposed to be two inches, and according to my measuring stick, yours is two-point-five."

*"I thought we'd be dead by step two, so this is going great."

*"The shoe's _lame."_

**alright another chapter done**

**10 points if you get rule 404**

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	53. Chapter 53

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 51 more rules  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**Fai Gensou: welcome back!,any new rules for me?**

**Curls101: thanks for the rule (got any more?)  
><strong>

**Helen Emerys: I like these rules you are giving me  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also I have taken some rules from TimeandSpaceandMe, and Tatyana Witwicky, thanks to all my reviewers and people I have taken Inspiration from**

**also sorry if I have stolin rules from, I have run out of Ideas so hopefully I will get some ideas soon  
><strong>

**I may be putting a few new OCs in my story, anyone who has a suggestion for a OC PM me with the following information**

** 1. name**

**2. apperence **

**3. personalty **

****4. relationships with the other characters**  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**411.** no singing any songs from Rent '_everyone just started singing _La Vie Boheme_, they were really good'-Gwen_

**412.** no trying to free discord because we do not want that type of evil out on the world

**413.** no trying to bring the end of the universe

**414.** no trying to beat Sherlock in a mind game because you will lose

**415.** no trying to hack a stargate because you may cause it to blow up

**416.** no trying to make Sherlock look like a fake because he will get depressed

**417.** no trying to figure out the skrass pradruguim because you do not need the power of a god

**418.** no trying to fly the TARDIS without looking because you will get something wrong

**419.** no trying to get Sherlock to look into the heart of the TARDIS

**420. **no trying to kill Sherlock

**alright another chapter done**

**10 points if you get rule 404**

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	54. more rules again

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 51 more rules  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**Fai Gensou: welcome back!,any new rules for me?**

**Curls101: thanks for the rule (got any more?)  
><strong>

**Helen Emerys: I like these rules you are giving me  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also I have taken some rules from TimeandSpaceandMe, and Tatyana Witwicky, thanks to all my reviewers and people I have taken Inspiration from**

**also sorry if I have stolin rules from, I have run out of Ideas so hopefully I will get some ideas soon  
><strong>

**I may be putting a few new OCs in my story, anyone who has a suggestion for a OC PM me with the following information**

** 1. name**

**2. apperence **

**3. personalty **

****4. relationships with the other characters**  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**421.** no letting Pinkie Pie throw you a Party

**422.** no hogging the coffee

**423.** no using Irene Adler to spice up your relationship _'Rory's eye started twitching and he had to go outside for a few hours'-Sec_

**424.** no trying to steal Derpy's muffins because she will get very angry

**425.** no trying to Download the Internet onto the TARDIS

**426.** no giving Pinkie Pie to GLaDOS because... well you Dont want to know

**427.** no trying to erase Amy from History because Rory will try and do the Same to you

**428.** no trying to give GLaDOS a human body because you will regret it

**429.** no going to Vegas because you will black out and you will regret

**430.** no trying to build a Gravity Gun

**lright another chapter done**

**10 points if you get rule 404**

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	55. Chapter 55

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 51 more rules  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**Fai Gensou:you did send me a rule about  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also I have taken some rules from TimeandSpaceandMe, and Tatyana Witwicky, thanks to all my reviewers and people I have taken Inspiration from**

**also sorry if I have stolin rules from, I have run out of Ideas so hopefully I will get some ideas soon  
><strong>

**I may be putting a few new OCs in my story, anyone who has a suggestion for a OC PM me with the following information**

** 1. name**

**2. apperence **

**3. personalty **

****4. relationships with the other characters**  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**431.** no trying to make a death ray

**432.** no calling Sec a mad scientist

**433.** no trying to travel time without a TARDIS '_Sec?-Doctor' 'Jack helped me__-Sec'_

**434.** no trying to take over the TARDIS

**435.** no trying to use the weather as a doomsday device

**436.**no trying to psychoanalysis Sherlock because he will somehow turn it around onto you "_Amy tried to bite him,Helen tried to magic him and both Doctors tried to use their sonics on him"_

**437.** forgive and forget

**438.** no trying to bring back Nightmare moon because she is not nice

**439. **no arm wrestling

**440.** no trying to play Russsian roulette

**alright another chapter done**

**10 points if you get rule 404**

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	56. new chapter at the moment

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**chapter 51 more rules  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who or the TARDIS all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**Fai Gensou:you did send me a rule about  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also I have taken some rules from TimeandSpaceandMe, and Tatyana Witwicky, thanks to all my reviewers and people I have taken Inspiration from**

**also sorry if I have stolin rules from, I have run out of Ideas so hopefully I will get some ideas soon  
><strong>

**I may be putting a few new OCs in my story, anyone who has a suggestion for a OC PM me with the following information**

** 1. name**

**2. apperence **

**3. personalty **

****4. relationships with the other characters**  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC and Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**441.** no TARDIS surfing

**442.** no trying to hack the internet

**442.** no trying to hide in another dimension

**443.** no trying to kill Sherlock

**444.** no trying to kill Rory

**445.** we are not a nudist colony so stop telling people we are Jack!

**446.** do not have sex in the control room

**447.** no getting Watson because He is as good as Sherlock when it comes to deducting

**448.** no letting Sherlock,Neal Caffrey, Shawn Spencer and Adrian Monk be in the same room because they will go crazy (crazier in Monks case)

**449.** no trying to get Wheatley to kill because he is disbelieving good at it

**500. **no pissing of the Sontrans

**alright another chapter done**

**10 points if you get rule 404**

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	57. EXTRA: mass effect rules

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**EXTRA! rules of the Normandy  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who ,the TARDIS or Mass Effect all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**Fai Gensou:you did send me a rule about  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also I have taken some rules from TimeandSpaceandMe, and Tatyana Witwicky, thanks to all my reviewers and people I have taken Inspiration from**

**also sorry if I have stolin rules from, I have run out of Ideas so hopefully I will get some ideas soon**

**I know that this Chapter is not Doctor who but I have recently got into this series and decided to see how I was at this so dont kill me! (also if you find these funny I may make a sperate story for this)  
><strong>

**I may be putting a few new OCs in my story, anyone who has a suggestion for a OC PM me with the following information**

** 1. name**

**2. apperence **

**3. personalty **

****4. relationships with the other characters**  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC, Jack/Everyone, M!Shep/Miranda/Jack, Garrus/Tali, Kasumi/Jacob, Joker/Human!EDI, F!Shep/Kelly  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**1.** no surfing on the nose of the ship "_whos bright Idea was this-Joker" "Tali-Garrus" "your are so _ _whipped bro-Shepard'_

**2.** no mocking the Reapers

**3.** no mocking the Council

**4.** no mocking Udina, even if he tried to kill the council

**5.** no mocking T.I.M _"how did he survive-Anderson" "I'm just that awesome-T.I.M"_

**6.**you should not drink three quarts of blue food coloring before a urine test

**7.**Nor should you drink three quarts of red food coloring, and scream during the same

**8.**We do not "charge into battle, naked, like the Celts"

**9.**no using the collectors base to take over the universe

**10.**when hanging out with that Doctor dude no trying to the TARDIS through a Mass Relay because we dont know what will happen _"tests inconclusive, need more research-Mordin" _

__**so what did everyone think of that, please tell me in your reviews if I should continue this or not  
><strong>

**alright another chapter done**

**10 points if you get rule 404**

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	58. Chapter 58

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**EXTRA! rules of the Normandy  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who ,the TARDIS or Mass Effect all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**sekhemt555: I will be using your OC in a chapter soon  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also I have taken some rules from TimeandSpaceandMe, and Tatyana Witwicky, thanks to all my reviewers and people I have taken Inspiration from**

**also sorry if I have stolin rules from, I have run out of Ideas so hopefully I will get some ideas soon**

**I know that this Chapter is not Doctor who but I have recently got into this series and decided to see how I was at this so dont kill me! (also if you find these funny I may make a sperate story for this)  
><strong>

**I may be putting a few new OCs in my story, anyone who has a suggestion for a OC PM me with the following information**

** 1. name**

**2. apperence **

**3. personalty **

****4. relationships with the other characters**  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC, Jack/Everyone, M!Shep/Miranda/Jack, Garrus/Tali, Kasumi/Jacob, Joker/Human!EDI, F!Shep/Kelly  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**501.**once again, Red vs. Blue quotes are discouraged.

*"I mean if I was killed by an alien, or a mobster, or you know, like some sort of sorority blow job massacre, that I can handle."

*"If that thing keeps talking bad about me, I'm gonna fuckin' smash it!"

*"Please make the red haired one stop talking to me."

*"Rest in peace, pinky toe... YOU SHALL BE AVENGED!"

*"I still haven't gotten my peanuts."

*"Oops! It broke itself."

*"People learn English all the time, it aren't that hard." (

*"Somebody call for a really hairy plumber? Bow chicka bow wow! I came here to lay down some pipe. Bow chicka bow wow! Are you a model or famous actress? Bow chicka bow wow! So, I hear you have sisters. Bow chicka-who are twins-wow wow! Bow chicka chicka bow bow chicka chicka bow bow chicka chicka bow bow!"

*"Swish-Fuck!-Swish, awwww- Stab! God damnit! Oh come on!"

*"Caan, I am having a blast going in and out of your hole!" (Rory and I just stood there.) ("I have nothing to add.") (Me.) ("Okay.") (Rory.)

*"Hey Doc, whatsup John, Sec is doing some experiments and I'm helping him, Doc! Right now we're doing one where everyone talks slow and the lights are super bright and I can smell CLOUDS and MAN is it SOO hot in here!" (Sec is banned from human testing.) (Man, I was tired!)

*"Who wants to hold my ankles while I stretch out my hammies!"

*"But blood is pretty important, so Rory is bound to have some side effects like nausea, dizzines, sensitivity to light..(Rory falls over.)... or passing out..."

*"It bounces! Who designs a gun that bounces! This has got to be the worst gun ever. Of all time!" (

*"Hey, is my body on straight?" (That can be anybody, just use your imagination.)

*"I've got half a mind to kill you...and the other half agrees." (Helen.)

*"Yes... And out from the darkness, there came... Someone! And that someone was me! Yes! And I said... Funerals are sad! So we should have a birthday party instead! Yes! Let there be cake! Hallelujah! Gesundheit."

*"I didn't say we couldn't do that, I said you are an idiot. Those are two totally different discussions."

*"Actually, personal warmth is very important, lets go get that mitten, it'll be like a mini quest!"

**502.** no saying the following:**  
><strong>

*"I'm going to live forver or die trying!"

*"Never knock on Death's door-ring the bell and run away. Death really hates that."

*"If you get a low enough SAT score, you should be able to park in the handicap space."

*"I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer."

*"They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill to many people."

*"I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you asshole!"

*"That, my children, is called a wall. But beware the wall is solid. Yes be afraid! Be very afraid for we cannot walk through it! Believe me children, for I have attempted this many times before."

*"High School Musical 3 and Saw V were the two top movies at the box office when they opened. One depicted gruesome on screen torture. The other was about a guy with a saw."

*"I do not deny everything."

*"You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then."

*"An apple a day, keeps the doctor away, if well aimed."

*"I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive. "

*"If your name is Mr. Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch?"

**503.** Brutal Legend quotes are being banned

*"Ass kickers unite!"

*"Decapitation!"

*"How about this? How about you take off your fucking diaper, lay down your little baby foofoo, get in the bus and go do your fucking job?"

*"Now I bet you wished you'd worn a bib 'cause you've got face all over your shirt!"

*"Come back when you grow a pair as big as your mom's!"

*"Have you been staring at my sword?"

*"Oh mighty sun, burn away the creatures of the night while I enjoy coffee and bacon."

**504.** no trying to let Pinkie Pie throw you a party when it is not your birthday

**505.** Jack, Moriarty and The Doctors will not be left alone with baby Melody

**506.** No more putting Leis on people.

(In the TARDIS, you can always get lie'd'..)

**507.** no trying to let the Doctor cook popcorn

**508.** no trying to commit Seppku

**509.** no trying to corrupt Natasha because River is very protective of her Daughter

**510.** no trying to out shoot Robin with arrows because you will lose

**so what did everyone think of that, please tell me in your reviews if I should continue this or not  
><strong>

**alright another chapter done**

**10 points if you get rule 404**

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	59. double rules

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**EXTRA! rules of the Normandy  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who ,the TARDIS or Mass Effect all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**sekhemt555: I always strive to make my readers laugh  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also I have taken some rules from TimeandSpaceandMe, and Tatyana Witwicky, thanks to all my reviewers and people I have taken Inspiration from**

**also sorry if I have stolin rules from, I have run out of Ideas so hopefully I will get some ideas soon**

**I have decided that the next few chapters will be Individual rules that are written from the point of other character First up! Amy and Sec  
><strong>

**I may be putting a few new OCs in my story, anyone who has a suggestion for a OC PM me with the following information**

** 1. name**

**2. apperence **

**3. personalty **

****4. relationships with the other characters**  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC, Jack/Everyone, M!Shep/Miranda/Jack, Garrus/Tali, Kasumi/Jacob, Joker/Human!EDI, F!Shep/Kelly  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**Rules for Amy**

**1. **I am not allowed to play gay chicken

**2.** no flirting to get what I want

**3.** no trying to make Rory go skydiving

(turns out he has a thing with heights, he faints)

**4.** when wearing a skirt make sure Rory or anyone else is not standing underneath the console

(we dont want a repeat of what happened when the TARDIS landed inside it self)

**5.** no trying to have a threesome with Rory and the Doctor

**6.** no trying to out magic Helen

(she has been useing magic a lot longer then me)

**7****.** no skinny dipping in the pool

**8.** no trying to make Rory a test dummy for my magic

**9.** no trying to bury anyone alive

**10.** no trying to outdrink Gwaine

**Rules for Sec**

**1.** no human testing

(I am now forced to test on mice)

(nevermind Helen just released all the mice)

**2.** no trying to test on Jack

(mainly because it takes longer for him to heal)

**3.** I am not allowed to try and get magic

**4.** I am not Batman

(I'M BATMAN!)

(now they are looking at me strange)

**5.** no trying to go cold turkey on coffee

(I dont remember much, Helen told me I was really scary and actually threatened to hurt someone. I do not want anyone to get hurt so I am never gonna stop drinking coffee)

**6.** no trying to build a car from scratch

**7.** no trying to use the Time Scoop with out supervision

(every time I try to use that machine something goes wrong)

**8.** no trying to ride a bicycle

(I somehow caused a volcano to erupt)

**9.** no trying to drink alot

**10.** I am not allowed to try and fly the TARDIS

(last time I did that I some how manged to make a sun go supernova)

**so what did everyone think of that, please tell me in your reviews if I should continue this or not  
><strong>

**alright another chapter done**

**10 points if you get rule 404**

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	60. second Double rules

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**EXTRA! rules of the Normandy  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who ,the TARDIS or Mass Effect all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**sekhemt555: I always strive to make my readers laugh  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also I have taken some rules from TimeandSpaceandMe, and Tatyana Witwicky, thanks to all my reviewers and people I have taken Inspiration from**

**also sorry if I have stolin rules from, I have run out of Ideas so hopefully I will get some ideas soon**

**I have decided that the next few chapters will be Individual rules that are written from the point of other character. Second up! Caan and Rory  
><strong>

**I may be putting a few new OCs in my story, anyone who has a suggestion for a OC PM me with the following information**

** 1.** _name_

**2. apperence **

**3. personalty **

****4. relationships with the other characters**  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC, Jack/Everyone, M!Shep/Miranda/Jack, Garrus/Tali, Kasumi/Jacob, Joker/Human!EDI, F!Shep/Kelly  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**rules for Caan**

**1.** sleep not a "challenge to my intellect"

(last time that happened Rory had to place sedatives in my coffee)

**2.** no trying to give myself wings

**3.** I am not allowed to drink Red Bull

**4.** no trying to set traps in mine and Secs lab

(I almost killed John with a spike wall)

**5.** no trying to do magic

**6.** no trying to ride a dragon

**7.** the lab is a non-nudity area

(you dont want to know)

**8.** no trying to kill John to see if he will get a new body

(he wont)

**9.** no trying to steal Luna's abacus

**10.** I am not allowed to OD on coffee

**rules for Rory**

**1.** no trying to sedate the Doctor when he is annoying

**2.** when asked by a priest on another world what bible I read the answer is not "the bro code"

**3.** no trying to stab Rose with my swords

(she surprised me)

**4.** there is no such thing as Pokemon

**5. **not allowed to get the Doctor drunk

**6.** no trying to fly the TARDIS

**7.**I am not to try and out-fly Rainbow Dash when in Pony-ville because I will lose badly

**8.** no wearing my Roman Armour

**9.** no trying to help Rainbow Dash fly when She is in a Human body

**10.** do not punch the Doctor in the Face for leaving Amy alone for 14 years

**so what did everyone think of that, please tell me in your reviews if I should continue this or not  
><strong>

**alright another chapter done**

**10 points if you get rule 404**

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	61. Chapter 61

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**EXTRA! rules of the Normandy  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who ,the TARDIS or Mass Effect all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**sekhemt555: I always strive to make my readers laugh  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also I have taken some rules from TimeandSpaceandMe, and Tatyana Witwicky, thanks to all my reviewers and people I have taken Inspiration from**

**also sorry if I have stolin rules from, I have run out of Ideas so hopefully I will get some ideas soon**

**I have decided that the next few chapters will be Individual rules that are written from the point of other character. THIRD up!Doctor and River Song**

**I may be putting a few new OCs in my story, anyone who has a suggestion for a OC PM me with the following information**

** 1.** _name_

**2. apperence **

**3. personalty **

****4. relationships with the other characters**  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC, Jack/Everyone, M!Shep/Miranda/Jack, Garrus/Tali, Kasumi/Jacob, Joker/Human!EDI, F!Shep/Kelly  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**rules for the Doctor**

**1. **I will not avoid sleep**  
><strong>

**2. **no trying stop death

**3.** no trying to rebuild the Time lords

**4.** no trying to build another TARDIS _because Last time you tried... or is that will try you almost blew up the universe _that has not happened yet _really well be careful _okay

**5.** no trying to have sex with Rose and John (It seems creepy)

**6.** no trying to have sex with Amy and Rory (no ... just no)

**7.** no trying to use the thu'um

**8.** no trying to play Minecraft

**9.** no trying to fly

**10.** no trying to teleport

**I may do River tomorrow when I have inspiration :)  
><strong>

**alright another chapter done**

**10 points if you get rule 404**

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	62. Chapter 62

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**EXTRA! rules of the Normandy  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who ,the TARDIS or Mass Effect all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**sekhemt555: I always strive to make my readers laugh  
><strong>

**also my loyal reviewers I may make a Rules for Torchwood so of you would like me to do so tell me in your reviews**

**and I would like to get this story out there by some one giving it a TvTropes recommendation thanks**

**also I have taken some rules from TimeandSpaceandMe, and Tatyana Witwicky, thanks to all my reviewers and people I have taken Inspiration from**

**also sorry if I have stolin rules from, I have run out of Ideas so hopefully I will get some ideas soon**

**I have decided that the next few chapters will be Individual rules that are written from the point of other character. THIRD up!Doctor and River Song**

**I may be putting a few new OCs in my story, anyone who has a suggestion for a OC PM me with the following information**

** 1.** _name_

**2. apperence **

**3. personalty **

****4. relationships with the other characters**  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC, Jack/Everyone, M!Shep/Miranda/Jack, Garrus/Tali, Kasumi/Jacob, Joker/Human!EDI, F!Shep/Kelly  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**rules for River Song**

**1.** no aloud to shoot the Doctors hat

**2.** no spiking anyone's drink

**3.** no trying to make anyone into a werewolf

**4.** there are reasons we don't talk about the library

**5.** no flirting with the Doctor while he is flying the TARIDS

**6.** facebook is not blackmail material

**7.** no posting photos taken when drunk on facebook

**8.** no trying to fly the TARDIS while drunk

**9**. no trying to fly

**10.** when meeting another Doctor from earlier on in my time-stream never tell him about what is about to happen

**I may do River tomorrow when I have inspiration :)  
><strong>

**alright another chapter done**

**10 points if you get rule 404**

**Peace off**

**so leave all you complaints/ideas/whatnot in the reviews section**

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	63. Chapter 63

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**EXTRA! rules of the Normandy  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who ,the TARDIS or Mass Effect all I own are my writings**

** reviewer messages:**

**thorluver: thanks for all of your reviews and PMs and I hope you enjoy the rest of the story  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC, Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**511.** no trying to kill John Smith to see if he will renew his body

**512.** no trying to sell anything Sec makes in his lab

**513.** no poking suddenly

**514.**no trying to kill someone for pokeing you

**515.** no trying to create explosives

**516.** no trying to kill someone because they "annoy you"

**517.** no trying to steal anything from Sec's lab

**518.** no trying to steal the sonic screwdriver

**519.** no using "I was bored" as justification for your actions

**520.** no trying to take the TARDIS underwater

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	64. fallout new vegas

**Rules of ****the TARDIS**

**EXTRA! rules of the Normandy  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who ,the TARDIS or Mass Effect all I own are my writings**

**I am so sorry for not being around the past weeks I have been in the middle of fallout new Vegas  
><strong>

**so I have decided that todays rules will be set in that fandom  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC, Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**rules of the Lucky 38  
><strong>

**1. **no trying to steal Boone's beret because he will kill you

**2.** when the Courier is out do not try and sneak into Yes man's room because the guards do not take prisoners

**3.**no trying to steal Arcade's power Armour

**4.** no assuming control of the Hoover Dam

**5.** no using a Stealth-Boy to poke Ceaser while he sleeps

**6.** no trying to see if you can fry a egg on Ceaser's head

**7.** I fought nature and nature won. Trust me, Eywa fights dirty _"what happened Boone?"-Veronica "I don't want to talk about it"-Boone _

**8.** At the beginning, Arcade Gannon was a nerd. At the end, he was still a nerd. But now he has a machine gun_  
><em>

**9.** Pets have to be cleared by the Courier

**10.**Keep bouncy balls out of briefings

**11. **Rex can smell fear

**12.**If Boone is Chewbacca, Cass is Buffy

**13.** do not try and hug a Super-Mutant

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	65. Chapter 65

Rules** of ****the TARDIS**

**EXTRA! rules of the Normandy  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who ,the TARDIS or Mass Effect all I own are my writings**

**I am so sorry for not being around the past weeks I have been in the middle of fallout new Vegas  
><strong>

**so I have decided that todays rules will be set in that fandom  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC, Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**rules of the Lucky 38 2  
><strong>

**14.** no trying to ride a brahmin because you will bucked

**15.** no trying to sneak a listing device onto Victor

**16.**no trying to test out a vertibird with out a pilot to help

**17.** no making a time machine

**18.** Boone is not aloud to cook

**19.** no trying to drag race

**20.**when Benny shows do not try and kill him

**21.** no challenging someone to "meet you at dawn, on the field of honor"

**22.** no trying to fire ARCHIMEDES

**23.** no trying to make a portal to another universe

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	66. avengers chapter

Rules** of ****the TARDIS**

**EXTRA! rules of the Normandy  
><strong>

**I do not own Doctor Who ,the TARDIS or Mass Effect all I own are my writings**

**I am so sorry for not being around the past weeks I have been in the middle of fallout new Vegas  
><strong>

**so I have decided that todays rules will be set in that fandom  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC, Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**rules of Stark tower (this one is for the avengers fandom, I will be soon putting up a Doctor Who chapter so look out for that)  
><strong>

**1. **no trying to piss of Bruce (remember he has a large green rage monster inside him-Tony)**  
><strong>

**2****.** when Darcy and Jane are visiting no flirting with them (Loki and Thor are very protective of their women- Nick Fury)

**3. **if you see a sock on the door, knock before you enter (is that why I saw Steve looking like he was about to throw up?-Tony) (yep-Clint)

**4.** no taking the Iron Man suit out without Tony's permission

**5.** no trying to steal Steve's shield

**6.** no trying to steal Thor's hammer

**7.** clothing is not optional (let me guess, Black Widow?-Coulson) (pretty much-Bruce)

**8.** no trying to fight Thor

**9.** when Maria is here no trying to sneak up on her

**10.** no food fights

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


	67. return of the TARDIS

Rules** of ****the TARDIS**

**I do not own Doctor Who ,the TARDIS or Mass Effect all I own are my writings**

**I am so sorry for not being around the past weeks I have been in the middle of fallout new Vegas  
><strong>

**so I have decided that todays rules will be set in that fandom  
><strong>

**relationships in this story: Amy/Rory (of course), River Song/Doctor, Sec/OC, Jack/Everyone  
><strong>

**anyway ON WITH THE RULES!**

**521.** when drunk no flying the TARDIS

**522. **When in the medbay, never NEVER never say...'Ohhhh what does this button do?'

(Rory gets very cranky.)

**523.** no trying to chuck Sec into space

**524.** when Castiel is in the TARDIS no saying to him "the Angel has the phone box"

**525.** no playing the staircase game

**526. **no going skydiving

**527.** no trying to steal anything

**528.** no locking anyone in a closet

**529.** when bored no trying to pick the locks of the lab

**530. **no taking over anyone's mind

**hope you have a good day**

**Spaceboi101  
><strong>


End file.
